griculture; but agriculture possessed no interest for me, nor, indeed,
any pursuit within my reach; my hopes of happiness had been blighted, and
what cared I for anything; so at last he thought it best to leave me to
myself, hoping that time would bring with it consolation; and I remained
solitary in my house, waited upon by a male and a female servant. Oh,
what dreary moments I passed! My only amusement--and it was a sad
one--was to look at the things which once belonged to my beloved, and
which were now in my possession. Oh, how fondly would I dwell upon them!
There were some books; I cared not for books, but these had belonged to
my beloved. Oh, how fondly did I dwell on them! Then there was her hat
and bonnet--oh, me, how fondly did I gaze upon them! and after looking at
her things for hours, I would sit and ruminate on the happiness I had
lost. How I execrated the moment I had gone to the fair to sell horses!
"Would that I had never been at Horncastle to sell horses!" I would say;
"I might at this moment have been enjoying the company of my beloved,
leading a happy, quiet, easy life, but for that fatal expedition." That
thought worked on my brain, till my brain seemed to turn round.

'One day I sat at the breakfast table gazing vacantly around me, my mind
was in a state of inexpressible misery; there was a whirl in my brain,
probably like that which people feel who are rapidly going mad; this
increased to such a degree that I felt giddiness coming upon me. To
abate this feeling I no longer permitted my eyes to wander about, but
fixed them upon an object on the table, and continued gazing at it for
several minutes without knowing what it was. At length the misery in my
head was somewhat stilled, my lips moved, and I heard myself saying,
"What odd marks!" I had fastened my eyes on the side of a teapot, and by
keeping them fixed upon it, had become aware of a fact that had escaped
my notice before--namely, that there were marks upon it. I kept my eyes
fixed upon them, and repeated at intervals, "What strange marks!"--for I
thought that looking upon the marks tended to abate the whirl in my head.
I kept tracing the marks one after the other, and I observed that though
they all bore a resemblance to each other, they were all to a certain
extent different. The smallest portion possible of curious interest had
been awakened within me, and, at last, I asked myself within my own mind,
"What motive could induce peo