o touch of cloistral cant;
Him England honours, and so bends to-day
In reverent grief o'er NEWMAN's glorious clay.

* * * * *

FEE VERY SIMPLE.

"In a recent case of brigandage, people of all sorts and
classes were implicated, while one of the leading barristers
was imprisoned on suspicion."--_Report of Consul Stigano, of
Palermo._

SCENE--_Chambers of Mr. E.S. TOPPEL, Q.C., in the Inner
Temple. Mr. TOPPEL discovered in consultation with a
Chancery Barrister, two Starving Juniors, and sixteen
Masked Ruffians armed to the teeth._

_Mr. Toppel_. Now that we have the Lord Chancellor, the Lord Chief
Justice, and the President of the Divorce Division, securely locked
up together in the attic, _and gagged_, we may, I think, congratulate
ourselves on the success of our proceedings so far! We are, I am sure,
quite agreed as to there having been no other course open to us than
to imitate our Sicilian brethren of the robe, and take to a little
mild brigandage, considering the awful decay of legal business and
our own destitute condition. (_Sympathetic cries of Hear, hear! from
the Chancery Barrister, and the two Starving Juniors._) I have no
doubt that a few hours spent in our attic will induce the High Legal
Dignitaries I have mentioned (_laughter_) to pay up the modest ransom
we demand, and to take the additional pledge of secresy. Meanwhile,
I propose that these sixteen excellent gentlemen should re-enter the
private Pirate Bus' which is waiting down-stairs, and see whether the
Master of the Rolls could not be--er--"detained _in transitu_" (_more
laughter_) while proceeding to his Court. It would be best, perhaps,
as Lord ESHER belongs to the Equity side, for our friend here of the
Chancery Bar to accommodate him in _his_ Chambers.

_Chancery Barrister_ (_alarmed_). But I have only a basement!

_Mr. Toppel_ (_calmly_). A basement will do very well. (_To the
sixteen Masked Men_). You will probably find Lord ESHER somewhere
about Chancery Lane. Impress on him that our fee in his case is a
thousand guineas; _or_--both ears lopped off! [_Exeunt the Sixteen._

_First Junior_. I went upstairs just now, in order to see how our
distinguished prisoners were getting on. The CHANCELLOR, I regret to
say, seemed dissatisfied with the bread and water supplied to him, and
asked for "necessaries suitable to his status." He appeared inclined
to argue the point; s