ORRAN _sit regarding the tablecloth
with downcast eyes, and expressions of the deepest gloom and
confusion_.

(_End of Scene V._)

* * * * *

Rhyme by a Rad.

[The question where the Liberal-Unionists shall sit has excited some
discussion.]

They have stolen the old Tory togs bit by bit,
And we wish they would openly don them.
However, it matters not much _where_ they sit,
For wherever it be we'll sit _on_ them!

* * * * *

"RAILWAY RATES."--Whatever question there may be on this subject, there can
be none whatever as to the rates at which "The Bournemouth Express," "The
Granville L. C. & D.," and "The Flying Dutchman," severally travel. Such
rates are first rate.

* * * * *

CON. FOR THE CONSOLATION OF THE MANY SUFFERERS FROM A CURRENT
CATCH-WORD.--_Q._ What is the only thing that is _really_
"up-to-date"?--_A._ A palm-tree.

* * * * *

MEM. FOR MR. VIVIAN AND THE ROYALISTS.--The Last of the STUARTS,--STUART
_KNILL_. There can be none after _Nil_.

* * * * *

DRAMATIC WITHOUT BEING STAGEY.

[Illustration]

The plan, successfully inaugurated, and, within the last fortnight, still
more successfully carried out by Sir DRURIOLANUS OPERATICUS BALMASCUS
PANTOMIMICUS, of giving what may be called "unstagey representations" of
popular Operas--that is, popular Operas sung and acted without the aid of
scenes or properties (though "substitutes" may be permitted, as, for
example, a chair with four legs complete would represent a horse, and a
round table a tower); the singers, however, being in costume, may work an
extensive "Transformation" Scene (which is quite in Sir DRURIO'S line) in
the Dramatic and Operatic world, and may effect such a change as will save
thousands to a Manager. Why not go a step further? Why have "costumes," or
even "hand-properties"? Why not leave everything, except the perfection of
the singing and the dramatic action, to the imagination of the audience?
The prices of admission would be proportionately lowered, and the numbers
admitted, in all probability, would be trebled, on which hypothesis a
calculation may be based. What an exercise it would be for the imagination
of the audience, were the Statue Scene from _Don Giovanni_ to be given with
the Basso Profondo in evening dress, who represents the Sto