the calaboose 'n' was
off. 'N' now 't he is gone, Mrs. Lathrop, I'm goin' to right out plain
'n' tell you to your face 's it's a good thing f'r you 's he _is_
gone, 'n' you want to thank Heaven 's sent him to you 't that train
was so handy to take him away ag'in."

"But what--" asked Mrs. Lathrop feebly.

"It was the cow," said Susan. "Don't you remember how I run last
night? I hear a noise, 'n' my first thought was 's it was Jathrop or
mebbe the butcher, but I got to the window jus' in time to see a tail
make the turn o' the gate, 'n' the seein' the tail showed right off 's
it warn't Jathrop nor yet the butcher. Seems 't Jathrop, not seein' no
ring to tie her to, tied her to a spoke in the hay-rack 'n' in her
mooin' she broke it. Seems't then she squose out into the chicken-coop
'n' then busted right through the wire nettin' 'n' set off. She run
like wild fire, they say. She headed right f'r town 'n' down the main
street. She come into the square lickety-split, 'n' the town committee
was in the middle of it examinin' the band-stand where Judge Fitch
says 't it shakes when he has to stamp 'n' pound in his speeches. She
come on the committee so sudden 't they did n't even know what it was.
She knocked Deacon White over on his back, 'n' threw Mr. Shores so
hard ag'in' the waterin'-trough 't all his suspender tins come out
before 'n' behind. Gran'ma Mullins was comin' across with six new
teacups done up in each hand. Ed was comin' along after her with the
saucers, but she'd told Mr. Kimball right out to his face as she would
n't trust Ed with nothin' as had handles 'n' so she'd carry them cups
home herself. The cow hit her cornering, 'n' them cups 'n' her false
teeth went all over the square. Some o' 'em hit Deacon White in the
face where he lay gaspin', but the cow never stopped. She jus' flew.
Mr. Fisher was hurryin' along to join the rest o' the committee 't the
bandstand, 'n' he met her next. She lowered her head 'n' jus' gouged
Mr. Fisher's three-quarters around him 'n' tore right on. She took the
crick road, 'n' Polly Allen 'n' Sam Duruy was out walkin' 'n' see her
pass. They say greased lightenin' was donkeys to the way she went. The
minister 'n' the six childern was jus' comin' home from Mrs. Brown's,
'n' the five childern at home was all come runnin' to meet them. The
cow charged right into the middle o' the bunch, 'n' the minister 'n'
all them eleven childern is laid out f'r one spell.

"Well, 'n' even _then_