is so utterly mysterious, that "thereby _hangs a tail_" is all
we are prepared to say respecting it.

We trust the above remarks will have thrown a light on the sun and moon,
illustrated the stars, and furnished a key to the skies in general; but
those who require further information are referred to Messrs. Adams and
Walker, whose plans of the universe, consisting of several yellow spots on
a few yards of black calico, are exactly the things to give the students of
astronomy a full development of those ideas which it has been our aim to
open out to him.

* * * * *

NEW STUFFING FOR THE SPEAKER'S CHAIR.

"With too much blood and too little brain, these two may run mad;
but if with too much brain and too little blood, they do, I'll be a
curer of madmen."--_Troilus and Cressida_.

MR. PETER BORTHWICK and Colonel Sibthorpe are both named as candidates for
the Speaker's chair. Peter has a certificate of being "a _bould_ speaker,"
from old Richardson, in whose company he was engaged as parade-clown and
check-taker. The gallant Colonel, however, is decidedly the favourite,
notwithstanding his very ungracious summary of the Whigs some time ago. We
would give one of the buttons off our hump to see

[Illustration: SIBTHORPE IN THE CHAIR.]

* * * * *

MR. JOSEPH MUGGINS begs to inform his old crony, PUNCH, that the report of
Sir John Pullon, "as to the possibility of elevating an ass to the head of
the poll by bribery and corruption" is perfectly correct, provided there is
no abatement in the price. Let him canvass again, and Mr. J.M. pledges
himself, whatever his weight, if he will only stand "one penny more, up
goes the donkey!"

[Illustration: CANDIDATE AT THE HEAD OF THE POLE.]

* * * * *

OLD BAILEY.

Robbed--Melbourne's butcher of his twelvemonth's billings.

Verdict--Stealing under forty shillings.

* * * * *

LEGAL PUGILISM.

The Chancery bar has been lately occupied with a question relating to a
patent for pins' heads. The costs are estimated at L5000. The lawyers are
the best boxers, after all. Only let them get a _head in chancery_, even a
_pin's_, and see how they make the proprietor _bleed_.

* * * * *

INQUEST.

Died, Eagle Rouse--Verdict, _Felo de se_.

Induced by being ta'en for--Ross, M.P.

* *