the water," which Jemmy duly did. The
steward, who was shooting with them, expected the same service, and
accordingly said, "Now, Jemmy, you must carry _me_ over." "Vera weel,"
said Jemmy. He took the steward on his back, and when he had carefully
carried him half-way across the river he paid off his grudge by dropping
him quietly into the water.

A daft individual used to frequent the same district, about whom a
variety of opinions were entertained,--some people thinking him not so
foolish as he sometimes seemed. On one occasion a person, wishing to
test whether he knew the value of money, held out a sixpence and a
penny, and offered him his choice. "I'll tak the wee ane," he said,
giving as his modest reason, "I'se no be greedy." At another time, a
miller laughing at him for his witlessness, he said, "Some things I ken,
and some I dinna ken." On being asked what he knew, he said, "I ken a
miller has aye a gey fat sou." "An' what d'ye no ken?" said the miller.
"Ou," he returned, "I dinna ken wha's expense she's fed at."

A very amusing collision of one of those penurious lairds, already
referred to, a certain Mr. Gordon of Rothie, with a half-daft beggar
wanderer of the name of Jock Muilton, has been recorded. The laird was
very shabby, as usual, and, meeting Jock, began to banter him on the
subject of his dress:--"Ye're very grand, Jock. Thae's fine claes ye hae
gotten; whaur did ye get that coat?" Jock told him who had given him his
coat, and then, looking slily at the laird, he inquired, as with great
simplicity, "And whaur did ye get _yours_, laird?"

For another admirable story of a rencontre between a penurious laird and
the parish natural I am indebted to the _Scotsman_, June 16, 1871. Once
on a time there was a Highland laird renowned for his caution in money
matters, and his precise keeping of books. His charities were there; but
that department of his bookkeeping was not believed to be heavy. On
examination, a sum of half-a-crown was unexpectedly discovered in it;
but this was accounted for in a manner creditable to his intentions, if
not to his success in executing them. It had been given in mistake
instead of a coin of a different denomination, to "the natural" of the
parish for holding his shelty while he transacted business at the bank.
A gleam in the boy's eye drew his attention to a gleam of white as the
metal dropped into his pocket. In vain the laird assured him it was not
a good bawbee--if he woul