he speakers emphatically laid down that the
minister should not have been satisfied, and had in fact made a most
unfortunate choice. He was thus answered by another parish
oracle--perhaps the schoolmaster, perhaps a weaver:--"Fat better culd
the man dee nir he's dune?--he bud tae big's dyke wi' the feal at fit
o't." He meant there was no choice of material--he could only take
what offered.
By the kindness of Dr. Begg, I have a most amusing anecdote to
illustrate how deeply long-tried associations were mixed up with the
habits of life in the older generation. A junior minister having to
assist at a church in a remote part of Aberdeenshire, the parochial
minister (one of the old school) promised his young friend a good glass
of whisky-toddy after all was over, adding slily and very significantly,
"and gude _smuggled_ whusky." His Southron guest thought it incumbent to
say, "Ah, minister, that's wrong, is it not? you know it is contrary to
Act of Parliament." The old Aberdonian could not so easily give up his
fine whisky to what he considered an unjust interference; so he quietly
said, "Oh, Acts o' Parliament lose their breath before they get to
Aberdeenshire."
There is something very amusing in the idea of what may be called the
"fitness of things," in regard to snuff-taking, which occurred to an
honest Highlander, a genuine lover of sneeshin. At the door of the
Blair-Athole Hotel he observed standing a magnificent man in full
tartans, and noticed with much admiration the wide dimensions of his
nostrils in a fine upturned nose. He accosted him, and, as his most
complimentary act, offered him his mull for a pinch. The stranger drew
up, and rather haughtily said: "I never take snuff." "Oh," said the
other, "that's a peety, for there's grand _accommodation_[15]!"
I don't know a better example of the sly sarcasm than the following
answer of a Scottish servant to the violent command of his enraged
master. A well-known coarse and abusive Scottish law functionary, when
driving out of his grounds, was shaken by his carriage coming in contact
with a large stone at the gate. He was very angry, and ordered the
gatekeeper to have it removed before his return. On driving home,
however, he encountered another severe shock by the wheels coming in
contact with the very same stone, which remained in the very same place.
Still more irritated than before, in his usual coarse language he called
the gatekeeper, and roared out: "You rasc
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