versed swivel-gun; but you have not yet
heard, my boy, anything at all about the unique manufacture of six
additional iron-plated squadrons, to participate with the
"Shockingbadhat" in the recent severe attack on Fort Piano. You have
not heard of these six new monsters before, my boy, and respect for the
really decent families of the inventors forbids that I should tell you
anything descriptive about them now, save their names.

It was intended that the name of the first should be something full of
significance to perfidious England, and, at the same time, something
never used in England. Hence, she was christened the "Aitch."

The second was to bear a name signifying the power of bending without
breaking; and so she was called after that elastic tree, the "Yew."

In the name of the third, the Government wished to pay a complimentary
tribute to Rear Admiral Head; and, in honor of his daughter, Emma, the
squadron was named the "Em."

The fourth iron-plated invulnerable Mackerel monster it was deemed
proper to decorate with a name expressive of industry coupled with a
power to sting; and so she was called the "Bee."

There was some discussion about the proper title for the fifth patent
iron-clad, each member of the generous Mackerel Naval Committee saying
to the other: "Why can't she be named after you?" So, it was at length
decided, to happily compromise the matter by calling her the "You."

By common consent the sixth invincible iron monster was adjudged to be
known by the first of General George B. McClellan's initials, and was
entitled the "Gee."

Add these new national champions of the deep, my boy, to the
"Shockingbadhat," and you will have some idea of the glorious naval
pageant prepared to administer wholesome correction to the irreverent
Confederacies of Fort Piano, and teach the world that worn-out
cooking-stoves can be sold to the sagacious Government of the United
States of America for something better than old iron.

The "Shockingbadhat" was the flag-ship; and, on the morning of the
attack, the hoary Rear Admiral Head repaired to the top of her turret
with his umbrella, fishing-rod, and pocket-microscope, taking with him
the Mackerel crew to work the improved swivel-gun, which was also up
there; and giving orders to another unconquerable Mackerel to locate
himself amidships with a quart measure, for the purpose of measuring
the number of bushels of shots striking the turret during the first two
secon