y watched the wood burning, they discussed the best
system of fuel.

Through economy they tried to smoke hams, and attempted to do the
washing themselves. Germaine, whom they inconvenienced, used to shrug
her shoulders. When the time came for making preserves she got angry,
and they took up their station in the bakehouse. It was a disused
wash-house, where there was, under the faggots, a big, old-fashioned
tub, excellently fitted for their projects, the ambition having seized
them to manufacture preserves.

Fourteen glass bottles were filled with tomatoes and green peas. They
coated the stoppers with quicklime and cheese, attached to the rims silk
cords, and then plunged them into boiling water. It evaporated; they
poured in cold water; the difference of temperature caused the bowls to
burst. Only three of them were saved. Then they procured old sardine
boxes, put veal cutlets into them, and plunged them into a vessel of
boiling water. They came out as round as balloons. The cold flattened
them out afterwards. To continue their experiments, they shut up in
other boxes eggs, chiccory, lobsters, a hotchpotch of fish, and a
soup!--and they applauded themselves like M. Appert, "on having fixed
the seasons." Such discoveries, according to Pecuchet, carried him
beyond the exploits of conquerors.

They improved upon Madame Bordin's pickles by spicing the vinegar with
pepper; and their brandy plums were very much superior. By the process
of steeping ratafia, they obtained raspberry and absinthe. With honey
and angelica in a cask of Bagnolles, they tried to make Malaga wine; and
they likewise undertook the manufacture of champagne! The bottles of
Chablis diluted with water must burst of themselves. Then he no longer
was doubtful of success.

Their studies widening, they came to suspect frauds in all articles of
food. They cavilled with the baker on the colour of his bread; they made
the grocer their enemy by maintaining that he adulterated his chocolate.
They went to Falaise for a jujube, and, even under the apothecary's own
eyes, they submitted his paste to the test of water. It assumed the
appearance of a piece of bacon, which indicated gelatine.

After this triumph, their pride rose to a high pitch. They bought up the
stock of a bankrupt distiller, and soon there arrived in the house
sieves, barrels, funnels, skimmers, filters, and scales, without
counting a bowl of wood with a ball attached and a Moreshead still,
which