etly in the house,
or to join in any outside gayeties to which you are invited, and show by
your manner that you enjoy both.

If games are proposed, do not say that you will not play, or "would
rather look on;" but join with the rest, and do the best you can. Never
let a foolish feeling of pride, lest you should not make so good an
appearance as the others, prevent your trying.

If you are not skillful, you will at least show that you are
good-natured, and that you do not think yourself modest when you are
only proud.

If you have any skill in head or fingers, you will never have a better
time to use it than when you are visiting; only, whatever you do, do
well, and do not urge your offers of assistance after you see that it is
not really desired. Mrs. Poyser, who is one of George Eliot's best
characters, says: "Folks as have no mind to be o' use have allays the
luck to be out o' the road when there's anything to be done." If you do
not find any place to be useful, you may be tolerably sure that it is
your own fault.

I heard a gentleman say of a young lady whose small affectations were
undergoing a sharp criticism, "Well, whatever you may say of her, she is
certainly more ready to make herself useful than any other young lady
who visits here. If I lose my glasses, or mislay the newspaper, or want
a stitch taken, she is always ready." And I shall never forget the
impression which a young lady made upon me, as I saw her sit idly
rocking backward and forward, complacently surveying the young friends
she was visiting as they were hurrying to finish peeling a basket of
peaches.

While visiting, remember that you meet many who are strangers to you,
and do not seem to you especially attractive, but who may still be dear
and valued friends of the family; and be cautious about making
criticisms upon them. Be friendly and cordial toward those whom you
meet, and try to show that you are ready to like them. Whatever
peculiarities you may observe, either in the family or its guests, which
strike you as amusing, be careful that you do not sin against the law of
love, by repeating little things, to their disadvantage, which you have
found out while you were admitted to the sanctuary of the home.

Do not ask questions which people would rather not answer, and be
careful not to speak of anything which will bring up painful
recollections, or be likely to cause unpleasant forebodings. The old
proverb expresses this in few words: