g. "Boy can walk in front
with a lamp, and Jonah can walk behind with a lamp----"

"And I can walk on both sides, I suppose, with a brazier in either hand.
Oh, this is too easy."

"We can but try," said I.

"You can but close your ugly head," said Berry. "If you want to walk
about London half the night, looking like a demobilised pantaloon, push
off and do it. But don't try and rope in innocent parties."

To this insult I made an appropriate reply, and the argument waxed. At
length----

"There's no reason," said Jonah, "why we shouldn't go on like this for
ever. If we had any sense, we should send for Fitch and desire his
opinion. It's rather more valuable than any one of ours, and, after all,
he's more or less interested. And you can trust him."

Now, Fitch was our chauffeur.

Amid a chorus of approval, I went to the telephone to speak to the
garage.

I was still waiting to be connected, when--

"Is that the Club?" said a voice.

"No," said I. "Nothing like it."

"Well, there's a bag of mine in the hall, and----"

"No, there isn't," said I.

"What d'you mean?" was the indignant retort.

"What I say. Our hall is bagless."

"I say," said the voice with laboured clarity, "I say there is a bag in
the hall. A BAG. Hang it all, you know what a bag is?"

"Rather," said I heartily. "What you put nuts in. An uncle of mine had
one."

The vehemence with which the unknown subscriber replaced his receiver
was terrible to hear.

Ten minutes later Fitch entered the room.

"Can you get to the Albert Hall to-night, Fitch?" said Daphne.

"I think so, madam. If we go slow."

"Can you get back from the Albert Hall to-morrow afternoon?" said Berry.

"If I can get there, sir, I can get back."

"How long will it take?"

"I ought to do it in 'alf an hour, sir. I can push along in the Park,
where it's all straight going. It's getting along the streets as'll take
the time. It's not that I won't find me way, but it's the watchin' out
for the hother vehicles, so as they don't run into you."

"Bit of an optimist, aren't you?"

"I don't think so, sir."

"Thank you, Fitch," said Daphne hastily. "Half-past nine, please."

"Very good, madam."

He bowed and withdrew.

Triumphantly my sister regarded her husband.

"At making a mountain out of a molehill," she said, "no one can touch
you."

Berry returned her gaze with a malevolent stare. Then he put a thumb to
his nose and extended his fingers in her direction