was thus encouraging. It was
not till Cecil was about to leave Eton for the University, that she was
at all startled at the amount of his debts, and then her principal alarm
arose more from the dread of her husband's anger towards her son, if he
discovered the fact, than from any maternal anxiety for Cecil's unsteady
principles. Her only wish was to pay off these numerous debts, without
disclosing them to the husband she so weakly dreaded. How could she
obtain so large a sum, even from her own banker, and thus apply it,
without his knowledge and assistance? The very anticipation of so much
trouble terrified her almost into a fit of illness; and rather than
exert her energies or expose her son to his father's wrath, she would
descend to deceit, and implore his assistance in obtaining the whole
amount, on pretence that she required it for the payment of her own
expenses and debts of honour. She imagined that she had sunk too low in
her husband's esteem to sink much lower; and therefore, if her requiring
money to discharge debts of honour exposed her yet more to his contempt,
it was not of much consequence; besides if it were, she could not help
it, a phrase with which Lady Helen ever contrived to silence the rebukes
of conscience when they troubled her, which, however, was not often.

She acted accordingly; but as she met the glance of her husband, a
glance in which sadness triumphed over severity, she was tempted to
throw herself at his feet, and beseech him not to imagine her the
dissipated woman her words betrayed, for Lady Helen loved her husband as
much as such a nature could love; but, of all things, she hated a scene,
and though every limb trembled with emotion, she permitted him to leave
her, stung almost to madness by the disclosure her request implied. Did
she play? was that fatal propensity added to her numerous other errors?
and yet never had anything fallen under his eye to prove that she did.
And what debts had she contracted to demand such a sum? Grahame felt she
had deceived him; that the money had never been expended on herself; but
he would not torture himself by demanding a true and full disclosure.
The conduct of his children had ever grieved him, and fearing too justly
the request of his wife related to them, madly and despairingly he
closed his eyes and his lips, thus probably encouraging an evil which he
might have prevented. He delivered the stated sum, and that same day
made over to his wife's own