t young woman--at least not
exactly young, but a sight younger than some, and all the better for
it--what word do you think I use to myself?"

"I don't know!" said Calvin shortly.

Mr. Sam leaned back, and expanded his red flannel waistcoat.

"Take time, Cal!" he said kindly. "Find a good solid-soundin' word
suitable to the occasion, and spit it out!"

"Look at here!" said Calvin, still more shortly. "I come out here to see
your hogs, and I've seen 'em. I didn't come out to play guessin' games;
if you've got anything to say to me, say it! If not, I'm goin' home."

Mr. Sam leaned forward, and poked Calvin in the ribs with a skinny
forefinger.

"Matrimony's the word, Cal!" he said. "Holy matrimony! Ain't that a good
word? ain't it suitable? ain't it what you might call providential?
ain't it? hey?" He paused for a reply; but none coming, he went on.

"I made use of that word, Calvin, the fust time Cousin stepped across
our thrishhold, four months back; and I've ben makin' use of it every
day since then. Now, Cal, I want you to help me!"

"Help you!" repeated Calvin, mechanically.

"Help me!" repeated Mr. Sam. "If you can help me to bring about
matrimony between Cousin and Simeon,--"

"_What_!" said Calvin Parks.

Mr. Sam stared. "Between Cousin and Simeon!" he repeated. "What did you
think I said? You could be of assistance to me, Calvin. You know Sim and
me ain't havin' any dealin's jest at present, and direckly you come
along I says to myself, 'Calvin,' I says, 'is the one who can be of
assistance to me.'"

"I thought 'twas you was goin' to marry her!" said Calvin grimly.

"Me, Cal? no! no! What put that into your head?" and Mr. Sam screwed his
features afresh, and shook his head emphatically. "I admire Cousin, none
more so; but if I was marryin',--and I don't say but I shall, some
day,--I should look out for something jest a mite more stylish. But
there's plenty of time, plenty of time. Besides, I want to travel,
Calvin. I want to see something of the world. Here I've sot all my days,
and never ben further than Bangor. Ma never held with the notion of
folks goin' out of the State of Maine. 'If folks want to go to
Massachusetts,' she'd say, 'they'd orter be born there.' Now, no
disrespect to Ma, you understand, Cal, but that ain't my idee. I want to
go to Boston, and maybe New York. I dono but I might go out west and
locate there. But there's the farm, you see, Cal, and there's Simeon.
Sim ain't a man th