sh. I'm abandoning the conflict, Jeff; I'm deserting to the
enemy. You'll find Miss Dugan inside contemplating the only living
mummy and the informed hog. She's a fine girl, Jeff. I'd have beat you
out if I could have kept up the grubless habit a little while longer.
You'll have to admit that the fasting dodge was aces-up for a while. I
figured it out that way. But say, Jeff, it's said that love makes the
world go around. Let me tell you, the announcement lacks verification.
It's the wind from the dinner horn that does it. I love that Mame
Dugan. I've gone six days without food in order to coincide with her
sentiments. Only one bite did I have. That was when I knocked the
tattooed man down with a war club and got a sandwich he was gobbling.
The manager fined me all my salary; but salary wasn't what I was
after. 'Twas that girl. I'd give my life for her, but I'd endanger my
immortal soul for a beef stew. Hunger is a horrible thing, Jeff. Love
and business and family and religion and art and patriotism are
nothing but shadows of words when a man's starving!'

"In such language Ed Collier discoursed to me, pathetic. I gathered
the diagnosis that his affections and his digestions had been
implicated in a scramble and the commissary had won out. I never
disliked Ed Collier. I searched my internal admonitions of suitable
etiquette to see if I could find a remark of a consoling nature, but
there was none convenient.

"'I'd be glad, now,' says Ed, 'if you'll let me go. I've been hard
hit, but I'll hit the ration supply harder. I'm going to clean out
every restaurant in town. I'm going to wade waist deep in sirloins and
swim in ham and eggs. It's an awful thing, Jeff Peters, for a man to
come to this pass--to give up his girl for something to eat--it's
worse than that man Esau, that swapped his copyright for a partridge--
but then, hunger's a fierce thing. You'll excuse me, now, Jeff, for I
smell a pervasion of ham frying in the distance, and my legs are
crying out to stampede in that direction.'

"'A hearty meal to you, Ed Collier,' I says to him, 'and no hard
feelings. For myself, I am projected to be an unseldom eater, and I
have condolence for your predicaments.'

"There was a sudden big whiff of frying ham smell on the breeze; and
the Champion Faster gives a snort and gallops off in the dark toward
fodder.

"I wish some of the cultured outfit that are always advertising the
extenuating circumstances of love and romanc