f law. Thereafter, in order to learn what manner of writing was
most honored by the Philistines, this Horvendile goes into an academy
where the faded old books of Philistia were stored, along with
yesterday's other leavings.

And as he perturbedly inspected these old books, one of the fifty
mummies which were installed in this Academy of Starch and Fetters,
with a hundred lackeys to attend them, spoke vexedly to Horvendile,
saying, as it was the custom of these mummies to say, before this
could be said to them, "I never heard of you before."

"Ah, sir, it is not that which is troubling me," then answered
Horvendile: "but rather, I am troubled because the book of my
journeying has been suspected of encroachment upon gastronomy. Now I
notice your most sacred volume here begins with a very remarkable myth
about the fruit of a tree in the middle of a garden, and goes on to
speak of the supper which Lot shared with two angels and with his
daughters also, and of the cakes which Tamar served to Amnon, and to
speak over and over again of eating--"

"Of course," replies the mummy, yawning, because he had heard this
silly sort of talking before.

"I notice that your most honored poet, here where the dust is
thickest, from the moment he began by writing about certain painted
berries which mocked the appetite of Dame Venus, and about a repast
from which luxurious Tarquin retired like a full-fed hound or a gorged
hawk, speaks continually of eating. And I notice that everybody, but
particularly the young person, is encouraged to read these books, and
other ancient books which speak very explicitly indeed of eating--"

"Of course," again replies the mummy (who had been for many years an
exponent of dormitive literacy)--"of course, young persons ought to
read them: for all these books are classics, and we who were more
obviously the heirs of the ages, and the inheritors of European
culture, used frequently to discuss these books in Paff's
beer-cellar."

"Well, but does the indecency of this word 'eating' evaporate out of
it as the years pass, so that the word is hurtful only when very
freshly written!"

The mummy blinked so wisely that you would never have guessed that the
brains and viscera of all these mummies had been removed when the
embalmers, Time and Conformity, were preparing these fifty for the
Academy of Starch and Fetters. "Young man, I doubt if the majority of
us here in the academy are deeply interested in this qu