sink herself entirely, must give up always to others, must never
show emotions except such as will be pleasing to those about her: this
is the secret of true politeness, and must be mastered if the woman
wishes to be well thought of and to lead a happy life. The effect of
this teaching is seen in the attractive but dignified manners of the
Japanese women, and even of the very little girls. They are not forward
nor pushing, neither are they awkwardly bashful; there is no
self-consciousness, neither is there any lack of _savoir faire_; a
childlike simplicity is united with a womanly consideration for the
comfort of those around them. A Japanese child seems to be the product
of a more perfect civilization than our own, for it comes into the world
with little of the savagery and barbarian bad manners that distinguish
children in this country, and the first ten or fifteen years of its life
do not seem to be passed in one long struggle to acquire a coating of
good manners that will help to render it less obnoxious in polite
society. How much of the politeness of the Japanese is the result of
training, and how much is inherited from generations of civilized
ancestors, it is difficult to tell; but my impression is, that babies
are born into the world with a good start in the matter of manners, and
that the uniformly gentle and courteous treatment that they receive from
those about them, together with the continual verbal teaching of the
principle of self-restraint and thoughtfulness of others, produce with
very little difficulty the universally attractive manners of the people.
One curious thing in a Japanese household is to see the formalities that
pass between brothers and sisters, and the respect paid to age by every
member of the family. The grandfather and grandmother come first of all
in everything,--no one at table must be helped before them in any case;
after them come the father and mother; and lastly, the children
according to their ages. A younger sister must always wait for the elder
and pay her due respect, even in the matter of walking into the room
before her. The wishes and convenience of the elder, rather than of the
younger, are to be consulted in everything, and this lesson must be
learned early by children. The difference in years may be slight, but
the elder-born has the first right in all cases.

Our little girl's place in the family is a pleasant one: she is the pet
and plaything of father and elder brothe