to
assume.

One word more as to the language I have chosen for the presentation of
my narrative. I have chosen English as the language in which to chisel
out these random recollections of mine for a variety of reasons. Most
conspicuous of these is that at the time of this writing no one has as
yet thought to devise a French, German, Spanish or Italian language.
Russian I have no familiarity with. Chinese I do not care for. Latin
and Greek few people can read, and as for Egyptian, while it is an
excellent and fluent tongue for speaking purposes, I find myself
appalled at the prospect of writing a story of the length of mine in
the hieroglyphics which up to date form the whole extent of Egyptian
chirography. An occasional pictorial rebus in a child's magazine is a
source of pleasure and profit to both the young and the old, but the
autobiography of a man of my years told in pictures, and pictures for
the most part of squab, spring chickens, and canvas-back ducks, would,
I fear, prove arduous reading. Moreover I am but an indifferent
draughtsman, and I suspect that when the precise thought that I have
in mind can best be expressed by a portrait of a humming-bird, or a
flamingo, my readers because of my inexpert handling of my tools would
hardly be able to distinguish the creature I should limn from an
albatross, a red-head duck, or a June-Bug, which would lead to a great
deal of obscurity, and in some cases might cause me to say things that
I should not care to be held responsible for. There is left me then
only a choice between English and Esperanto, and I incline to the
former, not because I do not wish the Esperantists well, but because
in the present condition of the latter's language, it affects the eye
more like a barbed-wire fence than a medium for the expression of
ideas.

At this stage of the proceedings I can think of nothing else either to
explain or to apologize for, but in closing I beg the reader to accept
my assurance that if in the narratives that follow he finds anything
that needs either explanation or apology, I shall be glad to explain
if he will bring the matter to my attention, and herewith tender in
advance for his acceptance any apology which occasion may require.

And so to my story.

GEORGE W. METHUSELAH.

Ararat Corners, B. C. 2348.

THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF METHUSELAH

CHAPTER I

I AM BORN AND NAMED

The date of my birth, occurring as it did, nine hundred and sixty-five
years