ADIES EXCLUSIVELY.

(Private and confidential, quite unknown to Judy.)

BRYANT has had orders to suspend a superb Mistletoe bough in the
publishing-office. PUNCH will be in attendance from daylight till dusk. To
prevent confusion, the salutes will he distributed according to the order
of arrival.

* * * * *

TO PUNSTERS AND OTHERS.

PUNCH begs to state he is open to receive tenders for letter-press matter,
to be illustrated by the

[Illustration: FOLLOWING CUT.]

N.B. They must be sent in sealed, and will be submitted to a select
committee, consisting of Peter Laurie, and Borthwick, and Deaf Burke.

N.B. No Cutting-his-Stick need apply.

* * * * *

PEN AND PALETTE PORTRAITS.

(TAKEN FROM THE FRENCH.)

BY ALPHONSE LECOURT.

(_Continued._)

PORTRAIT OF THE LOVER.

CHAPTER II.

IN WHICH THE AUTHOR TREATS OF LOVERS IN GENERAL.

[Illustration: A]All lovers are absurd and ridiculous. The passion which
spiritualises woman makes man a fool. Nothing can be more amusing than to
observe a bashful lover in company where the object of his affections is
present. He is the very picture of confusion and distress, looking like a
man who has lost something, and knows not where to seek for it. His eyes
wander from the carpet to the ceiling; at one moment he is engaged in
counting the panes in the window, and the next in watching the discursive
flights of a blue-bottle round the apartment. But while he appears
anxiously seeking for some object on which to fix his attention, he
carefully avoids looking towards his _innamorata_; and should their eyes
meet by chance, his cheeks assume the tint of the beet-root or the turnip,
and his manifest embarrassment betrays his secret to the most
inexperienced persons. In order to recover his confidence, he shifts his
seat, which seems suddenly to have shot forth as many pins as the back of
a hedgehog; but in doing so he places the leg of his chair on the toe of a
gouty, cross old uncle, or on the tail of a favourite lap-dog, and,
besides creating an awful _fracas_, succeeds in making inveterate enemies
of the two brutes for the remainder of their lives.

There are some lovers, who show their love by their affected indifference,
and appear smitten by any woman except the one whom they are devoted to.
This is an ingenious stratagem; but in general it is so badly managed,
that it is more easily seen through than a co