confronted with the twin
aspirants to academic honours. He regarded them with the mien of one
visibly relieved from a load of care. "These papers, gentlemen," he
said, pointing to certain documents which lay upon the tutorial table,
"relate to a project of which you have doubtless heard--I refer to the
extension of our Public Schools into the remoter regions of the British
Empire. They are reprinted from Mr. Sargant's admirable letter to the
_Times_, and the leading article on the subject. You are acquainted with
them--No? Then pray take the papers: you will find them most instructive
and agreeable reading during the voyage."

"The--the voyage?" exclaimed the Rhodes Scholar.

"Certainly," said the Tutor, "during the voyage. During the long
afternoons when you are steaming over the oily calm of the Bay of Biscay,
or being propelled (by friendly natives) down the rushing waters of
the--ah--Congo. What I am proposing is that you two gentlemen should
become members of our Branch Establishment in Timbuctoo. You _must_ have
heard of it! When schemes so beneficial to the Empire are mooted, was it
likely that the Colleges of our great Imperial Universities would not
take the lead in the van of progress? And when Eton, Harrow, and
Giggleswick have founded institutions, similar to themselves in every
respect except that of mere locality, in Asia, Africa, and Australasia,
was the College of St. Boniface to be a laggard? Assuredly not.
Gentlemen, I commend you to our Alma Mater beyond the seas."

"But, Professor," the Rhodes Scholar objected, "I was sent here across
the salt water dish to join the College of St. Boniface. They were kind
of sot upon that in Thessalonica. I guess they will be disappointed,
some, if I ain't made a professing member of St. Boniface."

"But you will be, my dear sir--you will be!" cried the Tutor, with
vehemence, "a member of St. Boniface-in-Timbuctoo: Sancti Bonifacii
Collegii apud Timbuctooenses alumnus: it is precisely the same thing.
You have doubtless read, in the course of your historical investigations,
how Eton is really an offshoot of Winchester: is Eton not a public
school? Of course it is. Similarly, in the Middle Ages a portion of the
University broke off and migrated to Stamford. Was it Oxford any the
less because it happened to be at Stamford? Not the least. The two
institutions--St. Boniface in Oxford and St. Boniface in Timbuctoo--are
precisely identical. When you g