stroyer of
Louvain library): "Too many books spoil the Goth." The CROWN PRINCE
contributes: "Beware the rift within the loot."

* * * * *

ZEITUNGS AND GAZETTINGS.

ROOSEVELT UNMASKED.

It is sad to relate, but persistent efforts to maintain the
disinterested claim on American friendship which we Germans have always
(when in need of it) advanced, continue to be misrepresented in that
stronghold of atheistical materialism and Byzantine voluptuousness, New
York. To the gifted Professor von Schwank's challenge, that he could not
fill a single "scrap of paper" with the record of acts of war on our
part which were incompatible with Divine guidance and the promulgation
of the higher culture, the effete and already discredited ROOSEVELT has
merely replied, "Could fill Rheims." This is very poor stuff and worthy
only of a creature who combines with the intellectual development of a
gorilla the pachymenia of the rhinoceros and the dental physiognomy of
the wart-hog. ROOSEVELT, once our friend, is plainly the enemy and must
be watched. Should he decide, however, even at the eleventh hour, to
fall in line with civilisation, he can rely on finding in Germany, in
return for any little acts of useful neutrality which he may be able to
perform, a generous ally, a faithful upholder of treaty obligations, and
a tenacious friend. There must surely be something that America
covets--something belonging to one of our enemies. Between men of honour
we need say no more.

BASE CALUMNY EXPOSED.

Let us speak plainly with regard to the Rheims affair. We have
successively maintained that this over-rated monument of Arimaspian
decadence (1) was not injured in any way; (2) was only blown to pieces
in conformity with the rules of civilised warfare; (3) was mutilated and
fired by our unscrupulous and barbaric opponents themselves; (4) was
deliberately pushed into our line of fire on the night of the 19th
September; (5) never existed at all, being indeed an elaborate but
puerile fiction basely invented by a baffled enemy with the object of
discrediting our enlightened army in the eyes of neutral Powers. Any of
these was good enough, but what now appears is better. Exact
measurements have since demonstrated beyond all question of cavil that
Rheims Cathedral had been built with mathematical accuracy to shield our
contemptible enemy's trenches around Chalons from our best gun positions
outside Laon. This act of tr