f for teaching, then I'll come back west to Illinois or Wisconsin.
Never will I return to this bleak world."

I offered my claim for sale and while I continued my daily labor on the
farm, my mind was far-away amid the imagined splendors of the east.

My father was puzzled and a good deal irritated by his son's dark moods.
My failure to fit into the store was unaccountable and unreasonable. "To
my thinking," said he, "you have all the school you need. You ought to
find it easy to make a living in a new, progressive community like
this."

To him, a son who wanted to go east was temporarily demented. It was an
absurd plan. "Why, it's against the drift of things. You can't make a
living back east. Hang onto your land and you'll come out all right. The
place for a young man is in the west."

Bitter and rebellious of mood, uneasy and uncertain of purpose my talks
with him resulted only in irritation and discord, but my mother, with an
abiding faith in my powers, offered no objection. She could not advise,
it was all so far above and beyond her, but she patted my hand and said,
"Cheer up! I'm sure it will come out all right. I hate to have you go,
but I guess Mr. Bashford is right. You need more schooling."

I could see that she was saddened by the thought of the separation which
was to follow--with a vague knowledge of the experience of all the
mothers of pioneer sons she feared that the days of our close
companionship were ended. The detachment was not for a few months, it
was final. Her face was very wistful and her voice tremulous as she
told me to go.

"It is hard for me to leave you and sister," I replied, "but I must. I'm
only rotting here. I'll come back--at least to visit you."

In tremendous excitement I mortgaged my claim for two hundred dollars
and with that in my hand, started for the land of Emerson, Longfellow,
and Hawthorne, believing that I was in truth reversing all the laws of
development, breasting the current of progress, stemming the tide of
emigration. All about me other young men were streaming toward the
sunset, pushing westward to escape the pressure of the earth-lords
behind, whilst I alone and poor, was daring all the dangers, all the
difficulties from which they were so eagerly escaping.

There was in my heart an illogical exaltation as though I too were about
to escape something--and yet when the actual moment of parting came, I
embraced my sorrowing mother, and kissed my quaint little sis