cat-harpings, because they were
so difficult to climb, that a cat would expostulate if ordered to go out
by them. I was afraid to venture, and then he proposed that I should go
through lubber's hole, which he said had been made for people like me.
I agreed to attempt it, as it appeared more easy, and at last arrived,
quite out of breath, and very happy to find myself in the main-top.

The captain of the main-top was there with two other sailors. The
midshipman introduced me very politely:--"Mr Jenkins--Mr Simple,
midshipman,--Mr Simple, Mr Jenkins, captain of the main-top. Mr
Jenkins, Mr Simple has come up with an order for a cocked-hat." The
captain of the top replied that he was very sorry that he had not one in
store, but the last had been served out to the captain's monkey. This
was very provoking. The captain of the top then asked me if I was ready
with my _footing_.

I replied, "Not very, for I had lost it two or three times when coming
up." He laughed and replied, that I should lose it altogether before I
went down; and that I must _hand_ it out. "_Hand out my footing_!" said
I, puzzled, and appealing to the midshipman; "what does he mean?"

"He means that you must fork out a seven-shilling bit."

I was just as wise as ever, and stared very much; when Mr Jenkins
desired the other men to get half-a-dozen _foxes_ and make _a spread
eagle_ of me, unless he had his parkisite. I never should have found
out what it all meant, had not the midshipman, who laughed till he
cried, at last informed me that it was the custom to give the men
something to drink the first time that I came aloft, and that if I did
not, they would tie me up to the rigging.

Having no money in my pocket, I promised to pay them as soon as I went
below; but Mr Jenkins would not trust me. "Why, sir," said I, "do you
know who you are speaking to? I am an officer and a gentleman. Do you
know who my grandfather is?"

"O yes," replied he, "very well."

"Then, who is he, sir?" replied I, very angrily.

"Who is he! why he's the _Lord knows who_."

"No," replied I, "that's not his name; he is Lord Privilege." (I was
very much surprised that he knew that my grandfather was a lord.) "And
do you suppose," continued I, "that I would forfeit the honour of my
family for a paltry seven shillings?"

This observation of mine, and a promise on the part of the midshipman,
who said he would be bail for me, satisfied Mr Jenkins, and he allowed
me