ait until after each Act, and retire with his pupils
into some quiet corner of the Refreshment-room, where he could give
his lecture. Or teacher and pupils could hear a Scene or an Act every
night,--and if they paid for their places (a reduction being made
for a quantity), the particular drama they patronised would be
considerably benefited by this plan.

There might be a uniform or an academic costume for these critical
scholars--say Shakspearian collars, Undergraduate gown, and portable
mortar-board, to fold up, and be sat upon. There might be a row
reserved for them at the back of the Dress Circle, and twenty-five
per cent. reduction on tickets for a series. The M.C., or Master of
Critics, would take a fee for a course from each pupil. Fee to include
seat at theatre, instruction, _and supper afterwards_.

* * * * *

IMPORTANT CONTRIBUTION TOWARDS THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE,--"Hallo!"
being the recognised telephonic summons in use between companies
and individuals of all nationalities, may be already considered as
"Hallo'd by a variety of associations."

* * * * *

MR. PUNCH'S POCKET IBSEN.

(_CONDENSED AND REVISED VERSION BY MR. P.'S OWN HARMLESS IBSENITE._)

NO. I.--ROSMERSHOeLM (CONCLUDED.)

ACT III.

_Sitting-room at Rosmershoelm. Sun shining outside in the
Garden. Inside REBECCA WEST is watering a geranium with
a small watering-pot. Her crochet antimacassar lies in
the arm-chair. Madam HELSETH is rubbing the chairs with
furniture-polish from a large bottle. Enter ROSMER, with his
hat and stick in his hand. Madam HELSETH corks the bottle
and goes out to the right._

_Rebecca_. Good morning, dear. (_A moment after--crocheting._) Have
you seen Rector KROLL's paper this morning? There's something about
_you_ in it.

_Rosmer_. Oh, indeed? (_Puts down hat and stick, and takes up paper._)
H'm! (_Reads--then walks about the room._) KROLL _has_ made it hot for
me. (_Reads some more._) Oh, this is _too_ bad! REBECCA, they _do_ say
such nasty spiteful things! They actually call me a renegade--and I
can't _think_ why! They _mustn't_ go on like this. All that is good in
human nature will go to ruin if they're allowed to attack an excellent
man like me! Only think, if I can make them see how unkind they have
been!

_Reb._ Yes, dear, in that you have a great and glorious object to
attain--and I wish you may get it!

_Rosmer_