en up for so great an occasion. Among other extras, the little
fellow's hair was treated to a liberal supply of eau de cologne, to his
huge gratification. As he entered the parlor, and made his bow to the
ladies and gentlemen--

"Lookee here," said he proudly, "if any one of you smells a smell,
that's _me_!"

The effect was decided, and Charles, having thus in one brief sentence
delivered an illustrative essay on human vanity, was the hero of the
evening.

BOY ALL OVER.

A DISTINGUISHED lawyer says, that in his young days, he taught a boy's
school, and the pupils wrote compositions; he sometimes received some of
a peculiar sort. The following are specimens:

"_On Industry._--It is bad for a man to be _idol_. Industry is the best
thing a man can have, and a wife is the next. Prophets and kings desired
it long, and without the site. Finis."

"_On the Seasons._--There is four seasons, Spring, Summer, Autumn, and
Winter. They are all pleasant. Some people may like the Spring best, but
as for me,--give me liberty, or give me death. The End."--_Olive
Branch._

PREPARATION FOR DINING.

AN Irish housemaid who was sent to call a gentleman to dinner, found him
engaged in using a tooth-brush. "Well, is he coming?" said the lady of
the house, as the servant returned. "Yes, Ma'am, directly," was the
reply; "he's just sharpening his teeth."

POETRY AND PRIGGING.

BETWEEN POETS and prigs, though seemingly "wide as the poles asunder" in
character, a strong analogy exists--and that list of "petty larceny
rogues" would certainly be incomplete, which did not include the
Parnassian professor. The difference, however, between Prigs and Poets
appears to be--that the former hold the well-known maxim of "Honor among
thieves" in reverence, and steal only from the public, while the latter,
less scrupulous, steal unblushingly from one another. This truth is as
old as Homer, and its proofs are as capable of demonstration as a
mathematical axiom. Should the alliance between the two professions be
questioned, the following case will justify our assertion.

Mike Smith, a ragged urchin, who, though hardly able to peep over a
police bar, has been in custody more than a dozen times for petty
thefts, was charged by William King, an industrious cobbler and
ginger-beer merchant, with having stolen a bottle of "ginger-pop" from
his stall.

The prosecutor declared the neighborhood in which his stall was
situated--that