r. Colman wishes to marry Elinor, and take her with
him to India.

O God, I beseech thee to spare me this great affliction! Remove not my
only joy!

But will she do this? Has there not been, without words, an
understanding between us two?

* * * * *

_September 23._--I open my journal on purpose to write down, while I am
calm, that I believe Mr. Colman to be a worthy, sincere man, and truly
anxious for the spread of the Gospel. I wish to set this down, because I
am sensible that at times my jealous feelings have caused me to misjudge
him, and may do so again. He knows nothing of my hopes and fears. He is
not to blame for wishing to brighten his days of exile with the sweetest
face that ever smiled. It is natural, when you see a lovely flower, to
wish to gather it and have it for your own. He does not know the flower
is mine. I speak boldly, but it is only to myself.

* * * * *

_September 25._--The Rev. Mr. D----, agent of the Missionary Society,
preached last evening a powerful discourse. What a man he is! His soul
is all on fire! And what language! There was deep silence in the
congregation. They were with him among the heathen. They saw what he had
seen. They heard what he had heard. They felt what he had felt. He
closed with an earnest appeal for fresh laborers in the vineyard. From a
high key he came suddenly down to a low, solemn tone, which suited well
with the agitated state of the audience.

"Beware," said he, "of permitting earthly joys, earthly hopes, earthly
loves, to come in the way of services due to Christ. Souls are perishing
for want of heavenly food, and you withhold it. Thousands, millions, are
on the broad road to destruction, and you refuse to extend a helping
hand. And why? Because you would enjoy a few short years of earthly
happiness. How mean, how worthless, how dearly bought, will appear these
few short years, when, at the judgment-day, the souls of these miserable
wretches shall cry out against you,--'We might have been saved! We might
have been saved!' And still, as the endless ages of eternity roll on,
the cry shall come up to you,--'We might have been saved! We might have
been saved!'"

Elinor was greatly agitated, weeping often. Sitting next her, I could
not help but take her hand in mine, to show my sympathy for her
distress. I fear she will consider it a sacred duty to sacrifice
herself. O, if she were a little, only