at didst thee give him, pray?

_Dennis._ I gave him a black-eye; and set up for myself at
Lestweithel; where Mr. Skinnygauge, the exciseman, was in his
honeymoon.--Poor soul! he was my patient, and died one day: but his
widow had such a neat notion of my subscriptions, that in three
weeks, she was Mrs. Brulgruddery.

_Dan._ He, he! so you jumped into the old man's money?

_Dennis._ Only a dirty hundred pounds. Then her brother-in-law, bad
luck to him! kept the Red Cow, upon Muckslush Heath, till his teeth
chatter'd him out of the world, in an ague.

_Dan._ Why, that be this very house.

_Dennis._ Ould Nick fly away with the roof of it! I took the
remainder of the lease, per advice of my bride, Mrs. Brulgruddery:
laid out her goodlooking hundred pound for the furniture, and the
goodwill; bought three pigs, that are going into a consumption;
took a sarvingman----

_Dan._ That's I.--I be a going into a consumption too, sin you hired
me.

_Dennis._ And devil a soul has darken'd my doors for a pot of beer
since I have been a publican.

_Dan._ See!--See, mun, see! yon's a traveller, sure as eggs!--and a
coming this road.

_Dennis._ Och, hubbaboo! a customer, at last! St. Patrick send he
may be a pure dry one! Be alive, Dan, be alive! run and tell him
there's elegant refreshment at the Red Cow.

_Dan._ I will--Oh, dang it, I doesn't mind a bit of a lie.

_Dennis._ And harkye:--say there's an accomplish'd landlord.

_Dan._ Ees--and a genteel waiter; but he'll see that.

_Dennis._ And, Dan;--sink that little bit of a thunder storm, that
has sour'd all the beer, you know.

_Dan._ What, dost take me for an oaf? Dang me, if he han't been used
to drink vinegar, he'll find it out fast enow of himsel, Ise warrant
un! [_Exit._

_Dennis._ Wife!--I must tell her the joyful news--Mrs. Brulgruddery!
my dear!--Devil choak my dear!--she's as deaf as a trunk-maker--Mrs.
Brulgruddery!

_Enter MRS. BRULGRUDDERY._

_Mrs. Brul._ And what do you want, now, with Mrs. Brulgruddery?
What's to become of us? tell me that. How are we going on, I shou'd
like to know?

_Dennis._ Mighty like a mile-stone--standing still, at this present
writing.

_Mrs. Brul._ A pretty situation we are in truly!

_Dennis._ Yes;--upon Muckslush Heath, and be damn'd to it.

_Mrs. Brul._ And, where is the fortune I brought you?

_Dennis._ All swallow'd up by the Red Cow.

_Mrs. Brul._