ul to use one's
fists.' The writer begs leave to tell both these species of canters that
they do not speak the words of truth.

* * * * *

'No,' said I, 'I do not mean to go to church.' 'May I ask thee
wherefore?' said Peter. 'Because,' said I, 'I prefer remaining beneath
the shade of these trees, listening to the sound of the leaves, and the
tinkling of the waters.'

* * * * *

Oh, genial and gladdening is the power of good ale, the true and proper
drink of Englishmen. He is not deserving of the name of Englishman who
speaketh against ale, that is good ale, like that which has just made
merry the hearts of this poor family; and yet there are beings, calling
themselves Englishmen, who say that it is a sin to drink a cup of ale,
and who, on coming to this passage will be tempted to fling down the book
and exclaim: 'The man is evidently a bad man, for behold, by his own
confession, he is not only fond of ale himself, but is in the habit of
tempting other people with it.' Alas! alas! what a number of silly
individuals there are in this world; I wonder what they would have had me
do in this instance--given the afflicted family a cup of cold water? go
to! They could have found water in the road, for there was a pellucid
spring only a few yards distant from the house, as they were well
aware--but they wanted not water; what should I have given them? meat and
bread? go to! They were not hungry; there was stifled sobbing in their
bosoms, and the first mouthful of strong meat would have choked them.
What should I have given them? Money! what right had I to insult them by
offering them money? Advice! words, words, words; friends, there is a
time for everything; there is a time for a cup of cold water; there is a
time for strong meat and bread; there is a time for advice, and there is
a time for ale; and I have generally found that the time for advice is
after a cup of ale--I do not say many cups; the tongue then speaketh more
smoothly, and the ear listeneth more benignantly; but why do I attempt to
reason with you? do I not know you for conceited creatures, with one
idea--and that a foolish one--a crotchet, for the sake of which ye would
sacrifice anything, religion if required--country? There, fling down my
book, I do not wish ye to walk any farther in my company, unless you cast
your nonsense away, which ye will never do, for it is the breath of your
nostrils; fling down my book, it was not written to support a cr