e if I coud remember what outlandish names the principal
gests was all called, and when I told him I thort they was HIGH-GIN
and DEMMY-GROGGY, they all roared again, and shouted out, "that's
another to you ROBERT; go ahead, my tulip!" Tho what they meant I'm
sure I don't kno.

Our gentlemanly Manager looked in to see how they was a getting on,
and when they told him what they called my last joke, ewen he larfed
away like the best on 'em. The fust time I gets a chance I'll ask him
to explain it all to me.

What seemed to have struck the Amerrycan most, was what he described
as the twelve most bewtifool Angels, all most bewtifoolly drest, in
most bewtifool close, a playing most bewtifool toons on most bewtifool
Arps! which he said reminded him more of Heaven than anythink he had
ever seen or heard. He arsked me the name of the bewtifool hair as
they played three times, and when I told him as I believed as it was
a Welsh wun, and was called "_The March of the Men of Garlick_," he
wonderd how men with such bad taste could have written such sweet
music.

They can tell jolly good staggerers they can! Why one on 'em said
as how we was a getting so scrowged up in the old Country, that they
thort of giving us jest a little slice of theirs, and as theirs was
about thirty times as big as ours, they could easily spare it.

But this I must and will say, they are perfect Gennelmen, and, as the
best possibel proof of it, they is allers werry libbral to me.

ROBERT.

* * * * *

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

[Illustration: Sensational.]

Interesting romance is MARION CRAWFORD's _Witch of Prague_: the witch
novel might easily have been told in one volume instead of three.
Skipping is good exercise.

The casual reader, and the travelling reader or journey-alist, won't
get much better entertainment for his money than he will find in
_Stories of Old and New Spain_, by THOMAS A. JANVIER. No April foolin'
around on the part of JANVIER with metaphysical digressions, but all
straight to the point. For sensation, try _Saint Mary of the Angels_.
Adelphi melodrama isn't in it with this story. Also in _San Antonio_
there is a simple, quiet humour; and _The Legend of Padre Jose_ is
singularly touching. Altogether a book this of infinite variety.
(_Signed_) BARON DE BOOK-WORMS.

* * * * *

"HOW'S THAT FOR HY"-GIENIC?--In spite of the London Season being over,
the Hygienic Congress