, foamin' like that,' I says.
"'Water!' says William. 'Ha, ha, ha.' It wasn't no giggle, that
laugh of his. It was one of them blood-curdlers you read about.
"'All right," says he, brisk, 'to oblige you--remember that.' He
turned the dipper upside down, then heaved it through the window.
'Sufferin' Ike'' says he, "I can't even taste it--nothin' but cold,
cold. Went down my gullet like a buckshot down a ten-foot shaft.'
He struggled for air and continued; 'Here am I,' says he, 'William
Pemberton, celebratin' Christmas by dyeing my linin' green and
smellin' like a recess in a country school.' His ventilation give
out again, whilest he worked his face into knots and flew his hands
around. 'You come along with me,' says he, 'and I'll show you a
Christmas celebration.'
"I grabbed him. 'William,' I says, 'your eye is desperate. You
explain to me before you scuff a foot.'
"'Leggo me,' he says; 'I tell you, leggo me, Zeke Scraggs. I'm
goin' to have my revenge. I'm goin' to take ten cases of giant
powder and blow the mill of Honorable John Lawson Davis, Member of
Congress, Champion Double-Jointed, Ground-and-Lofty,
Collar-and-Elbow, Skin and Liar, so high in the air that folks'll
think there's a new comet, predictin' war and trouble.'
"'William,' I says 'you ain't goin' to do no such thing--that's
wicked, that is.' I tried to speak stern, but this here Christmas
hadn't amounted to much so far, and I never had seen a stamp mill
blew up, so I couldn't help wonderin' how it would look.
"'See here!' says he, 'I'll admit many a time you've licked me in a
friendly way, Ezekiel, and I'm obliged to you; but, now, be you, or
ben't you, my guest?'
"'I be,' says I.
"'Then don't let's hear no more out of you,' he says, 'but come
along.'
"'The powder'll be friz,' I hints, still tryin' to switch him off.
"'Not much,' he says. 'She's down a cellar twenty foot deep--come
on.'
"'Just as you say, William,' I remarks--the only thing to do.
"So we toted ten cases of giant to the bottom of the mill, fixed
the cap and fuse careful, touched her off, and walked away from
there.
"Whilest I wouldn't have you think for a minute, dear friends and
brothers, that I uphold any conduct like that, for my part I'm
willin' to admit there's things less exhileratin' than standin' on
a small rise, of a clear, fine, moonlight winter night, waitin' to
see a fifty-stamp mill go off,
"And she went. Let me repeat it: she wen
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