am sure that
your friendship will help to that end.

About public affairs I am more anxious than I can say. I like Curio; I
hope Caesar may prove himself an honourable man; for Pompey I would
willingly give my life; yet, after all, I love no man so dearly as I
love the republic. You do not seem to be taking any very prominent part
in these difficulties; but you are somewhat tied by being at once a good
patriot and a loyal friend.

_To Atticus, in Rome_ Athens, B.C. 50

I arrived in Athens two days ago on my way home from my province, and
received your letter. I have been appalled by what you tell me about
Caesar's legions. I beg you, in the name of fortune, to apply all your
love for me and all your incomparable wisdom to the consideration of my
whole situation. I seem to see a dreadful contest coming, unless some
divinity have pity on the republic--such a contest as has never been
before. I do not ask you to think of this catastrophe; after all, it is
a calamity for all the world as well as for me.

What I want is that you should go into my personal dilemma. It was you
who advised me to secure the friendship of both parties; and much I wish
that I had attended from the first to your counsels. You persuaded me to
embrace the one, because he had done so much for me, and the other,
because he was powerful; and so I succeeded in engaging the affection of
both.

It seemed then quite clear that a friendship with Pompey need involve no
wrong to the republic, and that an allegiance to Caesar implied no
hostility to Pompey--such, at that time, was their union. But now, as
you show and as I plainly see, there will be a duel to the death; and
each, unless one of them is feigning, regards me as his. Pompey has no
doubt of it, for he knows that I approve of his political principles.
Moreover, I have a letter from each of them, arriving at the same time
as yours, indicating that neither of them values anyone more than me.
What am I to do?

If the worst comes to the worst, I know what to do. In the case of civil
war I am clear that it is better to be conquered with the one than to
conquer with the other. But I am in doubt how to meet the questions
which will be in active discussion when I arrive--whether he may be a
candidate in his absence from Rome, whether he must not dismiss his
army, and so on. When the president calls my name in the senate--"Speak,
Marcus Tullius!" am I to say, "Please wait until I have had a talk wi