civilized spoke in a low tone, and
any who cared to communicate must seek each other's presence. This had
been the reason for the old invention of E-pistol-ary correspondence.
This method, however, was not satisfactory, since it required much
time to say only a little, and since what was said in this manner was
found so wide of the mark as to produce disastrous results. Society
was, on this account, frequently rent with lawsuits, having no better
foundation than a bundle of Let-yers.

To avoid this trouble another invention, called the Far-talker (or
Tel-ef-oan), was made; and by means of this conceit the people of
Am-ri-ka could speak to one another many miles apart. The Far-talker
was a remarkable sort of invention by which one merchant, by
stretching a copper thread across the country to the ear of another
merchant, could talk to him _through the wire_. The other merchant
could reverse and talk back! Sometimes a young woman would tiptoe up
to the box where the wire ended and say the most absurd things to her
favorite fop down-town; this was often overheard. People had not yet
learned the method of understanding each other's thoughts without the
ridiculous contrivance of speech, written scratches, wires, and
Fo-ny-grafs.

It was at this time that men, in their effort to carry themselves from
place to place, seem to have taken the first hints from nature. It was
remembered that _between_ swimming and flying, and _between_ flying
and walking, certain forms of locomotion, quite rapid withal, are used
by our poor relatives on land and sea. Thus the flying-fish rises from
the water and shoots, quite parabolically, for some distance through
the air. The genus Cheiroptera also gives a hint of progress by means
of wings that are not made of feathers. The flying lemur, nearly akin
to _Homo bifurcans_, shows how one may rise and go by a sort of aerial
progress along the ground.

Out of these hints the men of Am-ri-ka, at the epoch of which we
speak, sought inventions by means of which they might keep close to
the ground for safety, but otherwise fly; for the age was very fast!
Under these conditions some Unknown Man invented what was called the
By-sigh-kel. It was a sort of flat-sided, rotary ground-skimmer, very
thin and notorious. It came coincidently with another invention called
the Trol-lee. The latter was an electrical wagon for general travel in
cities and suburbs, while the By-sigh-kel was a personal carriage for
on