way.

Sergeant to squad of recruits:--

"Henybody 'ere know anythink abart cars?"

"Yes; I do. I own a Rolls Royce."

"Olright; fall out and clean the major's motor bike."

One patriotic mother who had a son who was a butcher did her best to get
him to join the Royal Army Medical Corps, because he was proficient at
cutting up meat and would feel quite at home assisting at amputations.

-------------------------------------

Now that we are approaching the time for our departure to France we are
hearing that favorite farewell to all men going to the front, "Good-bye,
I'll look every day for your name in the casualty list."

The "Princess Pats" have already been in action. They had a hard fight and
many of them have been put out of business. We envied them when they went
away and still do, although it only seems yesterday that we were lying
together here and now a number of them are lying "somewhere in France."

The jam-making firm of Tickler was awarded a huge contract for the supply
of "Tommy's" daily four ounces of jam; either plum and apple were the
cheapest combination or else the crop of these two fruits must have been
enormous, because every single tin of jam that went to the training camps,
France, Dardanelles, or Mesopotamia, was of this mixture.

We became so tired of it that we used the unopened tins to make borders of
flower-beds, or we used them to make stepping-stones across puddles.
Eventually the world's supply of plums and apples having been used up, the
manufacturers were forced to use strawberries.

In the army all food is handled by the Army Service Corps, and as soon as
they found real jam coming through they took it for their own and still
forwarded on to us their reserve "plum and apple." The news got around
amongst the fighting units: result--the Army Service Corps is now known as
the "Strawberry Jam Pinchers."

Reviewed by King George V, and it was indeed a very impressive sight.
Although there were only twenty thousand troops, they seemed endless.
During the time that the King was on the parade ground in company with
Lord Kitchener, two aeroplanes kept guard in the sky. Our K. of K. is a
big, fine man who looks the part. An inspection by the King is always a
sure sign of a unit's impending departure. He traveled down on the new
railway which had just been built by the defaulters of the Canadian
Contingent.

At the last minute I managed to get weekend leave and went