called Fat Tom, he
got to be nicknamed the 'Natomy, which means a skeleton. It was in vain,
miss, that poor 'Natomy threatened to take to hard drinking, or pizen
himself with Prooshy acid, unless she took pity on him--not a smile, or
a kiss, or a hope could he get from cousin Biddy. Now, between
ourselves, I really think she had a sort of a sneaking notion after him;
you know, miss, that we women folks like to tease the men, by making
them think that we hate 'em, when all the time we are dead in love with
'em. Well, matters and things went on pretty much as I have said, for
some times; until something happened that made a great change in the
feelings of cousin Biddy towards Tom the coachman. Biddy slept in a nice
little bed-room in the attic--all by herself; and Tom slept in another
nice little bed-room in the attic--all by _himself_, too. Well, miss,
one night Biddy went to a fancy ball in Ann street, given in honor of
her brother's wife's second cousin, Mrs. MacFiggins, having been blessed
with three twins at a birth; she danced very late, and drank a great
deal of hot toddy, which made her so nervous that she had to go home in
a hackney-coach. She went to bed, but the toddy made her feel so very
uncomfortable, that she had to get up again, during the night; and she
happened, by accident, to reach her hand under the bed--and what do you
think, miss? her hand caught hold of something--she pulled it towards
her, out from under the bed--and oh, my gracious! what must have been
the feelings of the poor body, when she found that she had taken hold of
a man's--_nose!_ and, what was worse than all, that nose belonged to
Tom, the coachman! My poor cousin Biddy, on making this awful discovery,
gave a low scream, and fainted; and then--and then, miss--in about half
an hour, when she came to her senses, on finding that nobody, except
Tom, had heard her scream, she felt so kind of _put out_ about the whole
matter, that she agreed to marry Tom, if he would promise never to say
nothing about it. He agreed, and in a few weeks afterwards they were man
and wife. I heard this story, miss, from Biddy's own lips, and it's as
true as gospel. So that is the reason why I look under my bed every
night, to see if anybody is hid away there; because the very idea of
having a man _under_ a body's bed, is so awful! But bless me, miss--you
are fast asleep already, and I dare say you haven't heard half of my
story."

Matilda was right; Fanny had f