mned careful--I beg your pardon--

MRS. LORRIMER. Oh, don't apologize, I say it myself!--careful about
what?

JOHNSTONE. What sort of _husband you choose_.

MRS. LORRIMER. Exactly! None of your _ideal_ men for me! I want a man
with a bad record! [_Laugh._] Plenty of proof concealed about his
person, or not buried too deep in his past for me and my lawyer to
ferret out. I've a perfect duck of a lawyer! He made up every bit of
evidence about my last husband; that won me my case, and, my dears, it
just _happened_ to turn out to be true! [_Laugh._

ETHEL. Speaking of records, who do you think is here to-night?

MRS. LORRIMER. _Ned_ Fletcher--!!

KITTY. Yes.

MRS. LORRIMER. Girls--I'll tell you a secret--

JOHNSTONE. I don't want to hear it. [_Takes a chair left centre, sits
and lights cigarette._

MRS. LORRIMER. I'm crazy about him! Where is he? [_Glancing over her
shoulder._

KITTY. You've no chance; he's going to marry Marion, if she'll have
him.

MRS. LORRIMER. What a shame! And will she?

ETHEL. She's mad about him!

MRS. LORRIMER. The moth and the flame! What a pity! because he'd be
simply ideal for me! Why, do you know I hear that he-- [_Stops
suddenly, looking at_ JOHNSTONE _and_ FANSHAW.

JOHNSTONE. What do you hear? I'm in this.

MRS. LORRIMER. I forgot Johnny and Mr. Fanshaw--there are certain
things you mustn't talk about before innocent little boys!

FANSHAW. You couldn't tell _us anything about Ned Fletcher_!

MRS. LORRIMER. [_Laughing._] I don't want to! But I thought Marion was
always going to marry Douglas Rhodes.

KITTY. Oh, that's all off now. It's Ned Fletcher or nothing with
Marion.

ETHEL. [_Laughing_.] I believe she thinks she's going to reform him!
[_All laugh._

KITTY. There's one thing, he isn't after Marion's money.

ETHEL. Is he so rich?

JOHNSTONE. Oh, rotten! [KITTY _slaps_ JOHNSTONE.

MRS. LORRIMER. Very well, do you know what I shall do? I shall take
Douglas.

ETHEL. [_Hastily._] Yes, catch his heart on the rebound; they say it's
easier that way!

JOHNSTONE. That's one on you, Mrs. Lorrimer. [_Party gag._]

MRS. LORRIMER. Oh, I'm not so very old, and have had two splendid
husbands already. I don't think I have to bother about the easiest
way.

JOHNSTONE. Philopene, Ethel? That's one on _you_.

MRS. LORRIMER. Has it been your method, my dear, because if so I can't
congratulate you on the result. You must look out for a stronger
rebound next time! Try a di