. It was so small that I could
hardly get it on. The sleeves were so tight that the vaccination marks
on my arm must have shown plainly. The sleeves were too short, and my
hands and half of my forearm riding outside. The body was so tight that
I had to use a monkey-wrench to button it, and then I couldn't breathe
without unbuttoning one button. It was so tight that my ribs showed so
plain they could be counted.

I stuffed some pieces of grain sack in the shoes, and got them on, and
tied them, put on that awful hat, the bugle sounded to fall in, and I
fell out of my tent towards the place of assembly, with my carbine. If
we had been going out mounted, I could have managed to hide some of the
pants around the saddle, if I could have got my shoe over the horse's
back, but to walk out among men, stubbing my shoes against each other,
and interfering and knocking my ankles off, was pretty hard. The company
was about formed when I fell out of my tent, and when the men saw me
they snickered right out. I have heard a great many noises in my time
that took the life out of me.

The first shell that I heard whistle through the air, and shriek, and
explode, caused my hair to raise, and I was cold all up and down my
spine. The first flock of minnie bullets that sang about my vicinity
caused my flesh to creep and my heart's blood to stand still. Once I was
near a saw mill when the boiler exploded, and as the pieces of boiler
began to rain around me, I felt how weak and insignificant a small,
red-headed, freckled-faced man is. Once I heard a girl say "no," when I
had asked her a civil question, and I was so pale and weak that I could
hardly reply that I didn't care a continental whether she married me
or not, but I never felt quite so weak, and powerless, and ashamed, and
desperate as I did when I came out, falling over myself and the men of
my company snickered at my appearance. The captain held his hand over
his face and laughed. I fell in at the left of my company, and the
captain went to the right and looked down the line, and seeing my pants
out in front about a foot, he ordered me to stand back. I stood back,
and he looked at the rear of the line, and I stuck out worse behind, and
he made me move up. Finally he came down to where I was and told me to
throw out my chest. I tried to throw it out, and busted a button off,
but the pressure was too great, and my chest went back. Finally the
captain told me I could go to the right of