the meantime, all Nancy's relations having died, she
is thrown upon her own resources, and obtains a situation as kitchenmaid
at the Fitz. From a place of concealment she watches, with dismay, the
false behaviour of her former lover].

[Illustration: Richard, whose previous incursions into society had not
led him higher than A.B.C. shops, is unable to meet the bill. Vera
reveals herself in her true colours and refuses to offer monetary
assistance. The irate manager threatens to call in the police. Nancy to
the rescue!]

[Illustration: Nancy, having with her hard-earned savings discharged the
bill, is clasped to his breast by Richard, who then and there abjures
the Smart Set and makes stern resolve never again to fall a victim to
"the Lure of London."]

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Lieutenant_. "Nobody hurt? Then what the deuce are you
kicking up such a row for?"

_Tommy._ "Well, Sir, look at the mess they bloomin' 'Uns 'ave made in
the trench just after I've swep' it up!"]

* * * * *

MUSICAL JUMBOMANIA.

"The piano with a thirty-foot keyboard, forty-five octaves, and
five hundred and twenty-two keys, which Mr. Alfred Butt will
'present' in 'Follow the Crowd' at the Empire Theatre, is now in
course of construction. Six pianists will play it, and Mr.
Irving Berlin, the composer of 'Watch Your Step,' is composing
some special melodies for them."--_Sunday Paper._

The new Bombastophone which the Titanola Company are constructing for
Mr. Boomer, the famous War lecturer, is approaching completion. This
remarkable instrument, which roughly resembles a double-bassoon, stands
about 45 feet high, and has a compass of 500 octaves, from the low B
flat _in profundissimo_ to the high G on the Doncaster St. Leger line.
The use that Mr. Boomer makes of the Bombastophone is very original and
effective. Whenever he sees that the attention of his audience is
flagging he introduces an interlude of "bombination," which renders
lethargy impossible and exercises an indescribably stimulating effect on
the tympanum. The current of air is supplied by a bellows operated by an
eight-cylinder Brome engine, but Mr. Boomer works the keys himself,
climbing up and down them with a rapidity which must be seen to be
appreciated.

Another instrument which is expected to work a revolution in the realm
of sonority is the Clumbungo Drum, on which Mr. Wackford B