en called to prove what would be a reasonable figure for
the whole proprietary rights of a song."--_Times Law Reports,
Nov. 3rd._]

He came before the public t'other day!--
The Author of "_Ta-ra-ra-Boom-de-ay!_"
'Twas in a case before Judge GRANTHAM brought
(It should have been in Justice "COLLINS'" Court)
When the Inspired Bard the Jury faced.
As he within the witness-box was placed.
He told us how his Pegasus would fly
From plain (two guineas) up to (ten) the sky!
But for the song he wrote for LOTTIE fair
We hope he was a-Lottie'd a large share
In all its earnings. May it not be long
Ere he produce another catching song;
But should he fail, then when the poet's clay
Be laid to rest, it will suffice to say,
"_Vixit_. He wrote '_Ta-ra-ra-Boom-de-ay!_'"

* * * * *

MRS. R., on hearing that a Cricket-team, though not first-rate, had _a
leaven_ of good players, inquired how they could have more of them.

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE LORD MAYOR'S SHOW.

MEDITATIONS OF THE LORD MAYOR'S FOOTMAN.]

* * * * *

OPERA-GOERS' DIARY.

_Covent Garden, Tuesday, Nov. 1st._--_Tristan und Isolde_. About the
dullest thing that even a much-enduring Wagnerite ever heard. Glass
down to zero.

[Illustration: OUR CRITIC AT THE OPERA.

He heareth _Tristan | He heareth _Cavalleria | He seeth and heareth
und Isolde_ wrapt | Rusticana_ rapt in | _Aida_, "More power
in slumber. | ecstasy. | to your Melba!'"]

_Wednesday_.--Glass up again. _Orfeo_ with the two RAVOGLI and
the marvellous BAUERMEISTER as _Cupid_. Wonderful little lady
BAUERMEISTER-singer! I've said it before, and I repeat it
emphatically, BAUERMEISTER is "a little treasure" to an Operatic
Manager. MASCAGNI's _Cavalleria Rusticana_ was the second course
to-night, in which this adaptable lady, the _Cupid_ of the first
piece, appeared as old heart-broken grey-haired _Lucia_, the mother
of the gay _Turiddu_. Were Sir AUGUSTUS inclined to introduce a
little light English jocosity into this serious Opera, he might give
a line to the implacable _Alfio_, saying, "I've come to rid you of
_Turiddu_!" If MASCAGNI had heard this, he would have composed an
additional _Intermezzo_ expressing the whole force of the idea.

_Thursday_.--_Carmen_ expected, but tenor off colour, so change of air
(or should say airs) r