e he comes near a pretty woman.

MAN--as far as his opinions and emotions go--is the noblest work of
woman.

A KISS and its thrills are soon parted--after the honeymoon.

EVERY woman is born an actress; and actresses are twice as attractive to
men as other women because they are twice women.

[Illustration]

A DARK brown "past" is sometimes a good insurance against a black
future; the man who has "seen life" is not quite so likely to be looking
for it.

HAPPINESS in marriage doesn't depend half so much on whether or not a
man keeps the Ten Commandments and goes to church as on whether or not
he keeps a pretty stenographer and comes home to dinner.

WHEN a man declares that he knows his own mind, his wife may sometimes
wonder why he seems so proud of the acquaintance.

MARRYING a widower is like inheriting an heirloom; marrying a grass
widower is like getting second-hand goods that somebody else has been
anxious to get rid of.

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MATRIMONY is a life job with long hours, small pay, hard work, no
holidays and no chance to "give notice" if you get tired of it.

AFTER all, a wife has her uses--even if its only as a protection against
other ladies' breach of promise suits.

A PRETTY wife in a soiled kimono affects a man like a pate de fois gras
served on an old tin plate; it takes away his appetite--for love.

IT always surprises a woman when the son who has been tied to her apron
strings suddenly gets tangled up in some chorus girl's shoe strings.

A MAN'S idea of a perfectly loyal, devoted woman is one who will deceive
another man for his sake.

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A GIRL'S idea of business is a place where she can meet some man who
will take her out of it.

IN THE "relation of the sexes" a man is so likely to regard his wife as
the "poor relation."

NO MAN refuses to give a good wife all the credit she deserves; but some
of them are rather shy about giving her cash to the same amount.

A WOMAN on her summer vacation soon discovers that a husband is not "a
man of letters," but a man of off-hand notes and telegrams.

A LOVER looks at women through rose-colored spectacles, an old bachelor
through blue glasses, and a married man--through a microscope.

[Illustration]

A MAN always feels deeply injured when his wife refuses to believe the
story that he has worked at all the way up in the cab to make sound
interesting and perfectly plausible.

IT inspires a man with real awe and admiration