we show the eternal curse
and the second death.

"_June 19_, Sabbath.--Wet morning. Preached at Dunipace to a small
audience, on Parable of the Tares. I thank God for that blessed
parable.--In both discourses I can look back on many hateful thoughts
of pride, and self-admiration, and love of praise, stealing the heart
out of the service."

"_June 22._--Carron-shore. My last. Some tears; yet I fear some like
the messenger, not the message; and I fear I am so vain as to love
that love. Lord, let it not be so. Perish _my_ honor, but let _thine_
be exalted forever."

"_June 26._--True Sabbath-day. Golden sky. Full church, and more
liveliness than sometimes. Shall I call the liveliness of this day a
gale of the Spirit, or was all natural? I know that all was not of
grace; the self-admiration, the vanity, the desire of honor, the
bitterness--these were all breaths of earth or hell. But was there no
grace? Lord, Thou knowest. I dare not wrong Thee by saying--No!
Larbert Sabbath school with the same liveliness and joy. Domestic work
with the same. Praised be God! Oh that the savor of it may last
through the week! By this may I test if it be all of nature, or much
of grace. Alas! how I tremble for my Monday mornings--those seasons of
lifelessness. Lord, bless the seeds sown this day in the hearts of my
friends, by the hand of my friends, and all over the world--hasten the
harvest!"

"July 3.--After a week of working and hurried preparation, a Sabbath
of mingled peace and pain. Called, morning before preaching, to see
Mrs. E., dying. Preached on the Jailor--discomposedly--with some
glimpses of the genuine truth as it is in Jesus. Felt there was much
mingling of experience. At times the congregation was lightened up
from their dull flatness, and then they sunk again into lethargy. O
Lord, make me hang on Thee to open their hearts, Thou opener of
Lydia's heart. I fear Thou wilt not bless my preaching, until I am
brought thus to hang on Thee. Oh keep not back a blessing for my sin!
Afternoon--On the Highway of the Redeemed, with more ease and comfort.
Felt the truth sometimes boiling up from my heart into my words. Some
glimpses of tenderness, yet much less of that spirit than the last two
Sabbaths. Again saw the dying woman. Oh when will I plead, with my
tears and inward yearnings, over sinners! Oh, compassionate Lord, give
me to know what manner of spirit I am of! give me thy gentle Spirit,
that neither strives nor cries. Mu