hens, and makes 'em lay right along. Doan't cost nothin'
either."

I had been asked to give a lecture in a neighboring town, and, to change
the subject, inquired if he thought many would attend. Jake looked
rather blank, took off his cap, scratched his head, and then said:

"I dunno. Ef you was a Beecher or a Gough you could fill the hall, or
may be ef your more known like, and would talk to 'em free, you might
git 'em, or if you's going to sing or dress up to make 'em larf; but <i>as
'tis</i>, I dunno." After the effort was over I tried to sound him as to my
success. He was unusually reticent, and would only say: "Wall, the only
man I heard speak on't, said 'twas different from anything he ever
heard." This reminded me of a capital story told me by an old family
doctor many years ago. It was that sort of anecdote now out of fashion
with <i>raconteurs</i>--a long preamble, many details, a gradual increase of
interest, and a vivid climax, and when told by a sick bed would
sometimes weary the patient. A man not especially well known had given a
lecture in a New Hampshire town without rousing much enthusiasm in his
audience, and as he rode away on the top of the stage coach next morning
he tried to get some sort of opinion from Jim Barker, the driver. After
pumping in vain for a compliment the gentleman inquired: "Did you hear
nothing about my lecture from any of the people? I should like very much
to get some idea of how it was received."

"Wall, no, stranger, I can't say as I heerd much. I guess the folks was
purty well pleased. No one seemed to be ag'in it but Square Lothrop."

"And may I ask what he said?"

"Wall, I wouldn't mind it, if I'se you, what he said. He says just what
he thinks--right out with it, no matter who's hurt--and he usually gets
the gist on't. But I wouldn't mind what he said, the public was purty
generally pleased." And the long whip lash cracks and Jim shouts, "Get
an, Dandy."

"Yes," persisted the tortured man; "but I do want very much to know
what Squire Lothrop's opinion was."

"Now, stranger, I wouldn't think any more about the Square. He's got
good common sense and allers hits the nail on the head, but as I said,
you pleased 'em fust rate."

"Yes, but I must know what Squire Lothrop did say."

"Wall, if you will have it, he did say (and he's apt to get the gist
on't) he did say that <i>he</i> thought 'twas <i>awful shaller</i>!"

Many epigrammatic sayings come back to me, and one