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"Now, you listen up, Mr. Dickens, sir," said Mark Twain with
mock anger, for they were actually the best of friends. "I resent that,
and I won't have you filling the boy's head with a lot of imaginary
adventures and strange connections between words. Next you'll be telling
him there's a link between the Land of Ev and Robert Evans--or even more
ludicrous--that Frank Oz and Michael Ovitz of Hollywood have a mystical
link to Oz because they have Oz in their names, or even more ludicrous,
that you and Chris Dulabone have a connection because you both have the
initials C.D. I mean, how far can you go with this stuff? I'm telling
the boy about real things and about real life..."

Dickens just shook his head slowly and turned to Graham. "I really don't
pay much attention to his rambling. Go ahead and read his boring letters
before he has a kitten. I won't forget my promise to you, and we'll have
a delightfully interesting time together, you'll see. And I promise you,
my stories will not be imaginary. Oh, by the way, here's some of my
correspondence you might wish to take back with you. One is a letter and
note I sent to my American friend, Mr. Fields of Boston, and also some
beverage recipes I sent to Mrs. Fields. Also an announcement of two
plays I produced, one of which I acted in and--"

"You're not the only actor around here, Mr. Dickens, sir!" interrupted
Twain. "I've acted in plays, too. For example, I was in _Loan of a
Lover_ in 1876. Your Mrs. Fields, by the way, said I was wonderful in
it. And as long as you're producing letters you wrote to Mr. Fields,
I'll give young Graham a copy of a letter that I wrote to Mr. Fields. So
what do you think about that?"

Graham was astounded to hear these two world-famous personages fighting
like children and competing for his attention. What would his history
teacher and his fellow classmates think? He accepted the additional
material, then settled down to begin reading as the two men continued to
argue all the way back to their seats. He started with Mark Twain's
letters. There were actually four letters, one of them completely in
German, which Twain probably had not meant to hand him. But the boy read
it anyway, no matter that he did not understand a word. It did not dawn
on him that, if this was a dream, where did the German words come from
if they were not in his consciousness to begin with? Below is a copy of
the letters for the record, although it is sug