e from the usual place your favour of
yesterday. The contents of it have made me very thoughtful; and you
will have an answer in my gravest style.--I to have that Mr. Solmes!--No
indeed!--I will sooner--But I will write first to those passages in your
letter which are less concerning, that I may touch upon this part with
more patience.

As to what you mention of my sister's value for Mr. Lovelace, I am not
very much surprised at it. She takes such officious pains, and it is so
much her subject, to have it thought that she never did, and never could
like him, that she gives but too much room to suspect that she does. She
never tells the story of their parting, and of her refusal of him, but
her colour rises, she looks with disdain upon me, and mingles anger with
the airs she gives herself:--anger as well as airs, demonstrating, that
she refused a man whom she thought worth accepting: Where else is the
reason either for anger or boast?--Poor Bella! She is to be pitied--she
cannot either like or dislike with temper! Would to heaven she had been
mistress of all her wishes!--Would to heaven she had!

As to what you say of my giving up to my father's controul the estate
devised me, my motives at the time, as you acknowledge, were not
blamable. Your advice to me on the subject was grounded, as I remember,
on your good opinion of me; believing that I should not make a bad use
of the power willed me. Neither you nor I, my dear, although you now
assume the air of a diviner, [pardon me] could have believed that would
have happened which has happened, as to my father's part particularly.
You were indeed jealous of my brother's views against me; or rather of
his predominant love of himself; but I did not think so hardly of my
brother and sister as you always did. You never loved them; and ill-will
has eyes ever open to the faulty side; as good-will or love is blind
even to real imperfections. I will briefly recollect my motives.

I found jealousies and uneasiness rising in every breast, where all
before was unity and love. The honoured testator was reflected upon: a
second childhood was attributed to him; and I was censured, as having
taken advantage of it. All young creatures, thought I, more or less,
covet independency; but those who wish most for it, are seldom the
fittest to be trusted either with the government of themselves, or with
power over others. This is certainly a very high and unusual devise to
so young a creature. W