ANDERSON. It cannot be helped, Mrs. Dudgeon. We must take what comes to
us. (To Hawkins.) Go on, sir.

HAWKINS. "I give and bequeath my house at Websterbridge with the land
belonging to it and all the rest of my property soever to my eldest son
and heir, Richard Dudgeon."

RICHARD. Oho! The fatted calf, Minister, the fatted calf.

HAWKINS. "On these conditions--"

RICHARD. The devil! Are there conditions?

HAWKINS. "To wit: first, that he shall not let my brother Peter's
natural child starve or be driven by want to an evil life."

RICHARD (emphatically, striking his fist on the table). Agreed.

Mrs. Dudgeon, turning to look malignantly at Essie, misses her and
looks quickly round to see where she has moved to; then, seeing that
she has left the room without leave, closes her lips vengefully.

HAWKINS. "Second, that he shall be a good friend to my old horse Jim"--
(again slacking his head) he should have written James, sir.

RICHARD. James shall live in clover. Go on.

HAWKINS. "--and keep my deaf farm laborer Prodger Feston in his
service."

RICHARD. Prodger Feston shall get drunk every Saturday.

HAWKINS. "Third, that he make Christy a present on his marriage out of
the ornaments in the best room."

RICHARD (holding up the stuffed birds). Here you are, Christy.

CHRISTY (disappointed). I'd rather have the China peacocks.

RICHARD. You shall have both. (Christy is greatly pleased.) Go on.

HAWKINS. "Fourthly and lastly, that he try to live at peace with his
mother as far as she will consent to it."

RICHARD (dubiously). Hm! Anything more, Mr. Hawkins?

HAWKINS (solemnly). "Finally I gave and bequeath my soul into my
Maker's hands, humbly asking forgiveness for all my sins and mistakes,
and hoping that he will so guide my son that it may not be said that I
have done wrong in trusting to him rather than to others in the
perplexity of my last hour in this strange place."

ANDERSON. Amen.

THE UNCLES AND AUNTS. Amen.

RICHARD. My mother does not say Amen.

MRS. DUDGEON (rising, unable to give up her property without a
struggle). Mr. Hawkins: is that a proper will? Remember, I have his
rightful, legal will, drawn up by yourself, leaving all to me.

HAWKINS. This is a very wrongly and irregularly worded will, Mrs.
Dudgeon; though (turning politely to Richard) it contains in my
judgment an excellent disposal of his property.

ANDERSON (interposing before Mrs. Dudgeon can retort). That is not what