FREE BOOKS

Author's List




PREV.   NEXT  
|<   52   53   54   55   56   57   58   59   60   61   62   63   64   65   66   67   68   69   70   71   72   73   74   75   76  
77   78   79   80   81   82   >>  
nd comes down with his legs in a cluster like a bunch of asparagus. This will throw a Chinaman's liver into the northwest corner of his throat, and his upper left hand duodessimo into the middle of next week, but he doesn't complain. He opens his mouth and breaths in all of the atmosphere the rest of the universe can spare, and tickles the broncho on the starboard quarter with his cork sole. The mirth-provoking movement throws the broncho into the wildest hysterics, and for some minutes the spectator doesn't see anything very distinctly. The autumnal twilight seems fraught with blonde broncho and pale-blue shirt tail and Chinaman moving in an irregular orbit, and occasionally throwing off meteoric articles of apparel and pre-historic chunks of ingenious profanity of the vintage of Confucius. When the sky clears up a little the Chinaman's hair is down and in wild profusion about his olive features. His shirt flap is very much frayed, like an American flag that has snapped in the breeze for thirteen weeks. He finds also that he has telescoped his spinal column and jammed two ribs through the right superior duplex, has two or three vertebrae floating about through his system that he doesn't know what to do with. In fact, the Chinaman is a robust ruin, while the broncho is still in a good state of preservation. Now the broncho humps his back up into a circumambient atmosphere, and when he once bisects the earth's orbit and jabs his feet into the trembling earth a shapeless mass of brocaded silk and coarse black hair and taper nails and celestial shirt-tails and oolong profanity and disorganized Chinese remains comes down apparently from the New Jerusalem, and the coroner goes out on the street to get six good men and a chemist, and they analyze the collection. They report that the deceased had come to his death by reasons of concussion, induced by a ride from the outer battlements of the sweet by-and-by. BILL NYE WANTS TO KNOW HOW TO PRESERVE GAME. SLIPPERYELMHURST, HUDSON, WIS., Oct. 6.--_To the Editor:_ Might I ask, through the column of your justly celebrated paper, if any one will give me the requisite information regarding the care of game during the winter? My preserves are located on my estate here at Slipperyelmhurst, and while I am absent lecturing in the winter, in answer to the loud calls of the public, I am afraid that my game may not have the proper care, and that unscrupulous people may scalp m
PREV.   NEXT  
|<   52   53   54   55   56   57   58   59   60   61   62   63   64   65   66   67   68   69   70   71   72   73   74   75   76  
77   78   79   80   81   82   >>  



Top keywords:

broncho

 

Chinaman

 

profanity

 

atmosphere

 

column

 

winter

 
collection
 

analyze

 

chemist

 

reasons


circumambient
 

deceased

 

bisects

 

report

 

disorganized

 

Chinese

 

brocaded

 

coarse

 
oolong
 

remains


celestial

 
trembling
 

coroner

 

apparently

 

shapeless

 
Jerusalem
 

street

 
HUDSON
 

located

 

estate


Slipperyelmhurst

 

preserves

 

requisite

 

information

 

absent

 

lecturing

 

unscrupulous

 
proper
 

people

 

answer


public
 
afraid
 

PRESERVE

 
SLIPPERYELMHURST
 
induced
 
battlements
 

celebrated

 

justly

 

Editor

 

concussion