e;" she perceives, after marriage, that she has
given herself irrevocably to a thing "of shreds and patches."

There is a certain sort of little attentions, that ladies generally
expect from our sex, and a skill and adroitness in showing which makes
no inconsiderable part of a modern gentleman's education. I have known
many young men, who could not write two consecutive sentences, without
coming to an open rupture with orthography, grammar, or common sense, or
all three, if it was to save their well-_stocked_ necks from the halter,
or their souls, (what of that commodity they have,) from Satan's grip,
but who stood very high, and, doubtless, deservedly so, in the
estimation of the fair sex, simply from their skill and precision in
going through a certain routine of little trifling acts of politeness.

As far as ladies are concerned, politeness appears to consist chiefly in
a man's putting himself to more or less inconvenience, or exposing
himself to danger, on their account. With regard to the last, I do not
know but I could acquit myself to advantage, partly from the peculiar
recklessness that is acquired at sea; and partly because facing danger,
in the protection of the weaker sex, is both the duty of the stronger,
and the stronger generally can do it with less embarrassment, than
perform those innumerable, nameless, attentions, already alluded to. I
cannot say, however, that when walking out with ladies, I have felt
peculiarly desirous of the apparition of a mad bull, a ghost, or the
devil, to give me an opportunity to show my courage; but I think it is
certainly easier to most men to expose themselves to danger, in the
service of a lady, than to perform acceptably, and without awkwardness,
those little acts of politeness, that, in the present state of society,
ladies are somewhat rigorous in exacting. I have passed the very cream
and flower of my life at sea, that is, from nineteen to thirty-two, and
now, "in these latter days," begin to feel myself very much like a fish
out of water. How often have I "sailed into the northward" of a fair
lady's displeasure, for neglecting to assist her into, or out of, a
carriage! never dreaming, "poor ignorant sinner" that I am! that the
ascent up the steps of a coach was attended with any more perils, than
that of the stairs that lead to her bed-room; or that a girl, perhaps
twenty years my junior, glowing in the full bloom of youth, health, and
sprightliness, and with a step as