sly the girl could not have made the thing up. I passed my hand
wildly across my brow. 'But what have I done that she should fall in
love with me? What is there about me to attract any woman?'

'Nothink, as I can see,' she retorted, 'but with a woman's heart
there's no knowin' an' there's no tellin'. P'raps you've managed to
throw dust in her eyes.'

'I have thrown nothing--I mean, Miss Warrington and I are only slightly
acquainted with each other. I have, indeed, barely noticed her. And
now you tell me this horrible thing.'

She bridled. 'Wot's 'orrible about it? You ought to be glad. Most
men would be proud to marry a young lady 'oo's got such a light 'and
for pastry, and can mend up an old pair o' pants to make 'em look like
new. She's just the sort of wife----'

[Illustration: 'Wot's 'orrible about it?']

'"Wife,"' I interrupted, '"marry"? What do you mean by those words,
girl? Do you think for one instant if all the females in Christendom
were to fall in love with me I would _marry_ any one of them! No, a
thousand times, no. I repeat I will never, _never_ marry.'

'I 'eard yer,' said Elizabeth, 'and do you sit there and mean to tell
me that you're going to break a gentle woman's 'eart deliberate?'

The imputation caused me to shudder from head to foot. 'No, no,
Elizabeth. If I have unwittingly caused the lady pain I am deeply
remorseful. But she must, as soon as possible, be disillusioned.'

'Dish-who?' said Elizabeth. In this peculiar and baffling way does
she express herself. It makes a sustained conversation extremely
difficult and, at times, almost impossible.

'She must be brought to dislike me, I mean. In this matter I must ask
you to help me.' I took a ten-shilling note from my pocket. 'If, from
time to time, you will talk to Miss Warrington of my many faults--you
can invent what you like----'

'Shan't need to invent much in the way o' faults,' put in the monstrous
girl. 'But it's my belief she likes you for 'em. Some women are made
like that. Anyway,' she handed me back the note which I had
endeavoured to press into her warm, moist palm. 'I'm not wantin' this.
I'm not goin' to take blood money to 'elp to break any woman's 'eart.'

It sounded really terrible viewed in that light. 'There is no need for
you to put it in that coarse way,' I said, my temper rising. 'I only
ask you to help me to regain my peace of mind and secure Miss
Warrington's happiness.'

'Well, if