_thing is done_, sir;" and Sir
Hercules walked pompously about the room. "Saunders," said Sir Hercules,
stopping, after he had taken three or four turns up and down, and
joining his fingers behind his back, "I thought I perceived some
difference in you when you first addressed me. What has become of your
tail, sir?"

"My tail, your honor?" replied my father, looking as much a delinquent
as if he was still on board a man-of-war, and had been guilty of some
misdemeanor, "why, please your honor Sir Hercules--"

"I cut it off for him with my scissors," interrupted my mother, with a
courtesy. "Saunders was very savage when he came for to know it; but he
had a stupefaction of the brain, and was quite insensible at the time;
and so, Sir Hercules and my lady" (here a courtesy), "I thought it was
better--"

"Ah! I see--a brain fever," observed Sir Hercules. "Well, under these
circumstances you may have saved his life; but 'twas a pity, was it not,
my lady?--quite altered the man. You recollect his tail, my lady?"

"What a question, Sir Hercules!" replied her ladyship with great
dignity, turning round toward my mother.

My father appeared to be quite relieved from his dilemma by his wife's
presence of mind, and really thankful to her for coming to his
assistance; she had saved him from the mortification of telling the
truth. How true it is that married people, however much they may
quarrel, like to conceal their squabbles from the world!

"And what are you thinking of doing with your little girl?" said Lady
Hercules--"bringing her up to service, I presume. Leave that to me. As
soon as she is old enough, _the thing is done_, you need say no more
about it." Here her ladyship fell back in the large easy-chair on which
she was seated, with a self-satisfied air of patronage, and looking even
more dignified than her husband.

But my mother had no such intentions, and having first thanked her
ladyship for her great kindness, stated very humbly that she did not
much like the idea of her daughter going out to service, that she was
far from strong, and that her health would not allow her to undertake
hard work.

"Well, but I presume she may do the work of a lady's maid?" replied her
ladyship haughtily; "and it was that service which I intended for her."

"Indeed, Lady Hercules, you are very kind; but there is an objection,"
replied my mother, to gain time.

"Please your ladyship," said my father, who, to my great surprise, came