]Patritius prescribes four rules to be observed in
choosing of a wife (which who so will may read); Fonseca, the Spaniard, in
his _45. c. Amphitheat. Amoris_, sets down six special cautions for men,
four for women; Sam. Neander out of Shonbernerus, five for men, five for
women; Anthony Guivarra many good lessons; [6238]Cleobulus two alone,
others otherwise; as first to make a good choice in marriage, to invite
Christ to their wedding, and which [6239]St. Ambrose adviseth, _Deum
conjugii praesidem habere_, and to pray to him for her, _A Domino enim
datur uxor prudens_, Prov. xix. ) not to be too rash and precipitate in his
election, to run upon the first he meets, or dote on every stout fair piece
he sees, but to choose her as much by his ears as eyes, to be well advised
whom he takes, of what age, &c., and cautelous in his proceedings. An old
man should not marry a young woman, nor a young woman an old man, [6240]
_Quam male inaequales veniunt ad arata juvenci!_ such matches must needs
minister a perpetual cause of suspicion, and be distasteful to each other.

[6241] "Noctua ut in tumulis, super atque cadavera bubo,
Talis apud Sophoclem nostra puella sedet."

"Night-crows on tombs, owl sits on carcass dead,
So lies a wench with Sophocles in bed."

For Sophocles, as [6242]Atheneus describes him, was a very old man, as cold
as January, a bedfellow of bones, and doted yet upon Archippe, a young
courtesan, than which nothing can be more odious. [6243]_Senex maritus
uxori juveni ingratus est_, an old man is a most unwelcome guest to a young
wench, unable, unfit:

[6244] "Amplexus suos fugiunt puellae,
Omnis horret amor Venusque Hymenque."

And as in like case a good fellow that had but a peck of corn weekly to
grind, yet would needs build a new mill for it, found his error eftsoons,
for either he must let his mill lie waste, pull it quite down, or let
others grind at it. So these men, &c.

Seneca therefore disallows all such unseasonable matches, _habent enim
maledicti locum crebrae nuptiae._ And as [6245]Tully farther inveighs,
"'tis unfit for any, but ugly and filthy in old age." _Turpe senilis amor_,
one of the three things [6246]God hateth. Plutarch, in his book _contra
Coleten_, rails downright at such kind of marriages, which are attempted by
old men, _qui jam corpore impotenti, et a voluptatibus deserti, peccant
animo_, and makes a question whether in some cases it be tolerable at l