ou are,
you would have known long ago that the subject of your remarks is not
for any living man."

'I don't know what the subject of his remarks might have been, but he
spoke in a simply dreadful voice, my dear, and Dr. Break turned quite
white, and said Rene was a liar; and then Rene caught him by the throat,
and choked him black.

'Well, my dear, as if this wasn't deliciously exciting enough, just
exactly at that minute I heard a strange voice on the other side of the
hedge say, "What's this? What's this, Bucksteed?" and there was my
father and Sir Arthur Wesley on horseback in the lane; and there was
Rene kneeling on Dr. Break, and there was I up in the oak, listening
with all my ears.

'I must have leaned forward too much, and the voice gave me such a start
that I slipped. I had only time to make one jump on to the pigsty
roof--another, before the tiles broke, on to the pigsty wall--and then I
bounced down into the garden, just behind Jerry, with my hair full of
bark. Imagine the situation!'

'Oh, I can!' Una laughed till she nearly fell off the stool.

'Dad said, "Phil--a--del--phia!" and Sir Arthur Wesley said, "Good Ged!"
and Jerry put his foot on the pistol Rene had dropped. But Rene was
splendid. He never even looked at me. He began to untwist Dr. Break's
neckcloth as fast as he'd twisted it, and asked him if he felt better.

'"What's happened? What's happened?" said Dad.

'"A fit!" said Rene. "I fear my _confrere_ has had a fit. Do not be
alarmed. He recovers himself. Shall I bleed you a little, my dear
Doctor?" Dr. Break was very good too. He said, "I am vastly obliged,
Monsieur Laennec, but I am restored now." And as he went out of the gate
he told Dad it was a syncope--I think. Then Sir Arthur said, "Quite
right, Bucksteed. Not another word! They are both gentlemen." And he
took off his cocked hat to Dr. Break and Rene.

'But poor Dad wouldn't let well alone. He kept saying, "Philadelphia,
what does all this mean?"

'"Well, sir," I said, "I've only just come down. As far as I could see,
it looked as though Dr. Break had had a sudden seizure." That was quite
true--if you'd seen Rene seize him. Sir Arthur laughed. "Not much change
there, Bucksteed," he said. "She's a lady--a thorough lady."

'"Heaven knows she doesn't look like one," said poor Dad. "Go home,
Philadelphia."

'So I went home, my dear--don't laugh so!--right under Sir Arthur's
nose--a most enormous nose--feeling as though I were t