mal on a small
table in the middle of the room. The audience was on the tiptoe of
expectation, and crowded towards the table to see the famous war pig,
which, after its long confinement, and also, of course, from its natural
condition, was hardly able to stand. In a few words I introduced the war
pig--"Ladies and gentlemen,--In opening the performance this evening, I
have to show you the famous war pig from South America," &c., &c.

THE COBBLER'S DISCOVERY

There was an old fellow at the back of the room wearing a leather apron
and red cap, with his blue shirt sleeves rolled up--a typical old
cobbler. He pushed up to the table, and, after "eyeing" the "exhibit"
somewhat critically through his spectacles, he held forth as
follows:--"Nah, dus ta call thet a war pig?" in the vernacular peculiar
to the natives. I said, "Did ta ivver see a war pig i' thi life?" "Noa,"
said he blankly "it's t' _warst_ pig I ivver set mi een on." And then the
audience saw where the "war" pig came in, and they laughed heartily over
the joke. It was a relief to me when they did put the best face on the
affair. Under cover of the diversion I stole from the room, and prepared
to leave the place. I met Mrs Stangcliffe at the foot of the staircase.
She said "she did not know what to think about us, but there had been a
fearful noise, and she took it that we had pleased the company." With
this I left the inn, and got away to a place where I had arranged to wait
for Spencer.

TIPPO-SAHIB--THE INDIAN CAT

Yes; you will be wondering what has become of Spencer. Well; he stayed
behind to continue the show. As he told me afterwards, he appeared before
the screen and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen,--You don't seem to be quite
satisfied with the war pig from South America. I can assure you that I
have here a cat which I brought from India; they call her Tippo-Sahib.
She can tell fortunes. Tippo has told the fortunes of all the Indian
kings and princes, and I have brought her here expressly to tell the
ladies present their fortunes. Now, Tippo (introducing the Haworth-bred
cat to the audience), walk round the room and tell the ladies their
fortunes." Puss had no sooner been liberated than she bounded out at the
open door. Spencer said hastily, "I believe the climate of England is too
cold for Tippo; but I'll fetch her back." Upon this he darted out of the
door, and down the stairs after the scared cat; and this was the way
Spencer effected his es